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You are here: Home / Our Family Stories / Our Family Life / 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 | #1-7



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40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 | #1-7

Monday, February 19, 2007 (Updated: Wednesday, February 25, 2026)
11 Comments

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1. A woman is complete in Christ – nothing more and nothing less. Marriage and/or motherhood may change her worldly status and role, but they do nothing to make her more complete in Christ. Salvation, wholeness, and meaning are found in Christ alone.

2. To be a homemaker, I need to stay home. I do have a need to get out and, in order to be a good homemaker, I can’t stay home all the time. However, there is a point where my being out and about begins to negatively impact our home life. And the more I am out past that point, the negative influence in my home increases dramatically in the form of eating out, less nutritious meals, and various homemaking tasks that are left undone and/or get behind. It also increases our stress level because things are not flowing properly at home. As the manager of the home, what I do really sets the tone for how life unfolds for the three of us.




3. Being an older mom brings with it some surreal moments such as a day when you are discussing how to get your daughter to eat cereal and sleep through the night as well as your eye doctor telling you that bifocals are in your not-to-distant future.

4. Not everyone will like you or attempt to like you. Some people will dislike you for reasons you will never understand.

5. Only a very few people will truly understand you or attempt to understand who you are.

6. I believe 98.74% of the time that girls/women spend thinking/dreaming/worrying/obsessing about boys/guys/men is totally wasted.

7. There are only a few people in life who know you deeply, truly love you, and have only your best interest in mind. For me, these people are my husband and my parents. You have to know exactly who they are and then trust them to give you good advice when you are in situations where you are too emotionally involved to think clearly.

See all of the posts in this series:

  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #1-7
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #8-15
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #16-19
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #20
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #21-30
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #31-39
  • 40 Things I’ve Learned By Age 40 – #40

Category: Our Family LifeTag: 40 Things I've Learned By Age 40

About Sallie Borrink

Sallie Schaaf Borrink is a Christian, wife, mother, homeschooler, homebody, and autodidact. She owns a home-based graphic design and web design business with her husband (DavidandSallie.com).

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Marianna

    Monday, February 19, 2007 at 10:49 pm

    What wonderful wisdom! I especially like number 2. Can’t wait to read the rest. I’m also turning 40 this year so you have me thinking now of what I’ve learned in 40 years of life!

    Reply
  2. Marie

    Monday, February 19, 2007 at 11:00 pm

    #4 is one I never have been able to accept.

    Reply
  3. Wilm

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 3:47 am

    Number 4 also jumped out at me – I think I needed to read this one today.
    How can some people give off the vibe that they aren’t interested/don’t like you, and they actually don’t even know you?? I don’t get that……….

    Your number 2 is also timely – I have been thinking that I may be out too much with my children and that we are involved in too much. So hard to get that balance right.

    Thanks! Great list Sallie!

    Cheers, Wilm

    Reply
  4. Amy Helmericks

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 4:38 am

    4, 5, and 7, all about being known/cared-for/thought well of, those are the easiest to understand (especially from experience) and (like the pp alluded to) the hardest to live with.

    They seem to require giving up on those very natural desires, but in a sense that’s what’s needed, too…

    *sigh*

    Reply
  5. Lindsey @ enjoythejourney

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 8:30 am

    Sallie, great so far. I’m finding that #4 is especially true. The older I get the more confident I am in who I am—I am no longer seeking to be a man-pleaser but yet, live to please God and my family. Above and beyond that is frosting!

    Reply
  6. Kelly

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 11:54 am

    There is so much truth and wisdome here. I can relate to several in my own life.

    Reply
  7. Brenda@CoffeeTeaBooks&Me

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 12:42 pm

    Happy Birthday! I found entering my 40s to be a wonderful age. It was like everything I’d learned before turned into real wisdom.

    I, too, was an older mom with my second. My daughter began college on the same day my son started Kindergarten. We won the “couple with the youngest child” award at my husband’s 25th high school reunion the year our son was born.

    Reply
  8. Patricia (Pollywog Creek)

    Tuesday, February 20, 2007 at 2:18 pm

    Yes. I was 31 when I had my first child and 41 when I had my last, though we raised my nephew as our own and on the day he was married, our youngest was just 4 months old. I nearly held up the wedding, as mother of the groom, while nursing my baby. A surreal “older” mother moment for me was when I bought infant tylenol at the grocery store and the cashier asked if it was for my granddaughter. It gets more surreal as time goes on, Sallie, but it will keep you young at heart, as well!

    Reply
  9. Jenny

    Thursday, February 22, 2007 at 1:35 pm

    Since moving away from family and friends, I’ve really learned #4. I hurts still to look out the window and see my neighbors. I wonder why they don’t like me? I guess I’ll never know.

    Reply
  10. Claire

    Friday, February 23, 2007 at 6:27 pm

    Sallie,
    Clearly God intended for me to visit your site today. It was recommended to me by a blogger named Louise. I have been struggling with infertility for the past three years, and am currently starting the adoption process (I’m almost 38). Anyway, when I got home from work today I was feeling depressed about a former aquaintance/friend who doesn’t like me for reasons that are not clear. # 4 and #5 were just what I needed to hear tonight. God bless you!

    Reply
  11. In Pursuit of His Call

    Saturday, March 3, 2007 at 10:32 am

    Thank you for your wisdom.

    I am a new reader to your blog as I recently just started my own blog. The goal to my blog is to record my own life lessons so that when the Lord gives me the opportunity to mentor as is called in Titus 2, I am able to share some wisdom too.

    I just entered my 30’s and reading the life lessons of someone with more wisdom is very encouraging. Thank you again for sharing and may your 40th birthday be a blessed one.

    Reply

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Sallie Schaaf Borrink

I’m Sallie — wife, mother, just-retired homeschooler, and happy warrior for Christ. Our little family lives a quiet and cozy life of home education, self-employment, and pithy exchanges. I’ve been writing here for 20+ years as a curator of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty. I don't peddle trendy aesthetics or ideas, but write about what I'm learning while thinking for myself. And I like to laugh. A lot. Start here. ♥

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