I feel as though I straddle two different worlds. My childhood was during the 1970s so I remember life before the technology we think of as essential today: computers, answering machines, VCRs, video games, calculators, cordless phones, cell phones, remote control TVs, etc. I can put myself in that time and know what it was like to need change for a pay phone, have no way of getting in contact with someone quickly, and watching only three television channels. I learned to use a computer my last year of college. I didn’t own a cell phone until I was in my thirties.
But now I make a living via technology along with the husband I met via technology. I’m the older mom of daughter who is currently in elementary school. She truly has no concept of a world without technology. I am surrounded by parenting peers who grew up with technology. It is a natural part of their lives. It’s like another world.
For all the benefits of technology (such as sharing life with those who read here), I think it is also incredibly harmful to many women today. I think I can see it more clearly because I know life without it. The expectations we put on ourselves due to the constant stream of unrealistic ideas we see paraded before us… It’s craziness. I think this goes for both moms and teachers.
Childhood Crafts from the 1970s
The crafts below are from my 1970s childhood. They are all things I made in public elementary school (except the square candle which my younger brother made). My mom had saved these in a box and passed them along to me.
What’s striking to me is that I remember making all of them. It’s also striking that my mom saved them all these years. I remember them and she saved them because we didn’t do crafts all the time. It was a special occurrence to do something like this. I can think of a couple of other crafts I did that aren’t in the picture, but that’s it.
This is a candle made in a milk box from a school lunch. The teacher probably collected the milk cartons from the kids who bought their lunch or bought their milk. This candle, decorated with glitter to make it special, was a gift for my mom.
Christmas tissue wrapping paper made at school.
A candle made in a ice cream cone. With more pink glitter. The glitter was a BIG DEAL, FOLKS! That was a special project to add GLITTER. We did not have endless crafting supplies at our disposal. There was no Hobby Lobby or Michael’s or Amazon. Glitter was special and carefully hoarded for very. special. projects. I don’t think I personally owned any glitter until I was in a sorority in college. This was also a gift.
(Do you notice a pattern that crafts were for gifts? They weren’t for just because the kids need something to do.)
So why do I share this?
Mommy Guilt and Unrealistic Expectations
In this age of Pinterest, we are constantly bombarded by over-the-top (and often expensive) craft projects. We feel the subtle pressure that we should be doing these things as well. We have moms (and teachers) running around thinking they are epic failures if they don’t have fancy crafts for their kids to do every week. They think every unit needs to have a “culminating project” or it’s a bad unit. Homeschooling moms get the double dose since they are responsible to be not only mom but teacher as well.
It’s truly not necessary.
I wrote a few years ago about how I don’t plan crafts for Caroline. I don’t. Because she is very creative, I do make a lot of materials available to her in a well-stocked craft cabinet. I will buy her craft kits if she requests them, but I have planned almost no crafts for her. I refuse to buy into the mommy guilt and expectations paraded before me all the time.
I’m thankful for the perspective of a non-technological childhood, something that is rapidly becoming lost to history. I’m thankful that it allows me to see beyond the ridiculous expectations and pursue a simpler approach to parenting.
If you are tempted to feel burdened or overwhelmed in this area of your parenting journey, I encourage you to resist as well.
Caroline’s Craft Essentials
flic-flac 44PCS 4 x 4 inches (10 x10cm) Assorted Color Felt Fabric Sheets Patchwork Sewing DIY Craft 1mm ThickCreativity Street Chenille Stems/Pipe Cleaners 12 Inch x 6mm 100-Piece, Assorted ColorsAleene’s 36116 Original Tacky Glue 3 Pack, 8 OzSharpie Color Burst Permanent Markers, Fine Point, Assorted Colors, 24-CountDuct Tape 6-Pack White , Purple, Pink, Skulls, Rainbow Leopard, Peace & LoveCCbetter Mini Hot Melt Glue Gun with 25pcs Glue Sticks High Temperature Melting Glue Gun Kit Flexible Trigger for DIY Small Craft Projects&Sealing and Quick Repairs(20-watt, Blue)Pony Beads Multi Color 9mm 1000 Pcs in BagElmer’s 3D Washable Glitter Pens Flat Box, 31 Rainbow and Glitter Colors (E198)