Don’t be fooled by the post title. I chose the phrase of quit Facebook permanently and delete it purely for the SEO value and so people would find this post in the search engines. If I created a post title that accurately reflects my thoughts and feelings, it would be something like one of these.
- Facebook’s Insidious Reach Into Every Aspect of Our Lives
- Facebook’s Ongoing Destruction of Life as We Knew It
- Facebook is Controlling Your Every Thought and Emotion – Really
- How Facebook Traps You Into Virtual Slavery
- Use Facebook or End Up Homeless?
It might seem like I am exaggerating a bit, but only a bit. And while I’m writing primarily about Facebook, I think much of it applies to other social media networks such as Twitter, Instagram, LinkedIn, etc.
Quitting Facebook
I didn’t join Facebook until January 2013 and hell froze over that day because I didn’t think I ever would. I had said in 2009 in a now-unpublished post that I was not convinced Facebook was necessary. It took me years after that to finally join, primarily for professional reasons. I’ve enjoyed it for stretches, but have really wanted to leave during the past year.
So why don’t I?
If you only use Facebook for personal reasons such as keeping in touch with people out of town or catching up with people from your past, then quitting Facebook might be daunting but it is doable. Prepare yourself for the fact that you could become a social outcast according to the extensive reading I’ve done (such as this article about the unexpected side effects of quitting Facebook), but you can do it.
For business owners, it feels a bit more tricky (especially for professional bloggers or people who work online developing websites like my husband and I do). It seems like Facebook slowly puts their tentacles into virtually every area of your personal and professional life until it feels like it’s nearly impossible to leave.
I’ve been thinking seriously about this quitting Facebook thing for a year, not just for my own situation but to understand why quitting Facebook is such a big deal. Why people have such strong reactions about it. So I’ve been reading about it. Asking people about it. Starting discussions. Following my two blogging heroes who had the courage to quit Facebook (Heather and Sue). I have especially followed Sue’s journey because our personalities are quite similar and I can relate to much of what she wrote as she processed her decision by writing about it multiple times on her website. (I think she’s an INFJ like me.)
She also completely quit it – deleted it all. Personal, website page, website group… All of it. Gone.
(I can imagine the rush of freedom and relief she felt when she did so.)
Why You Should Quit Facebook – A List of Articles
As I’ve reflected on the entire phenomena of why it’s so difficult for people to quit Facebook and delete it all, I read far and wide. Here is a sampling of what I’ve read that covers everything from personal experience pieces to more scientific information about the destructive aspects of social media. It’s not in the scope of what I’m writing here to cover all the scientific aspects. Suffice it to say that I think there are plenty of reasons to be concerned regarding the use of social media.
I’ve found the articles and video from Dr. Cal Newport, author of Deep Work: Rule for Focused Success in a Distracted World, to be especially interesting because his thoughts confirm what I have already seen in myself and the way I work best. This list does not include, of course, any of the numerous conversations I’ve had on Facebook because those conversations are held captive on Facebook. (The rest of my post follows these links.)
- Quit Social Media. Your Career May Depend On It.
- Sean Parker on Facebook’s Brain Hacking
- How Quitting Facebook Changed My Life for the Better
- Farewell Facebook (This one generated a gazillion comments!)
- Beneath First Light (Lots of comments here too.)
- I Deleted My Facebook A Year Ago: Here’s What Happened
- The REAL Reason to Quit Facebook (and 10 what-ifs)
- I Used to Be a Human Being
- Please, Please, Please Quit Social Media (But Not For The Reason You Expect)
And this video is quite interesting and well worth your time. He hits on all the big points.
The reality is it feels incredibly hard to walk away once you become a part of Facebook personally and professionally. I believe Facebook has made it that way on purpose and continues to look for fresh ways to help enslave people.
The Insidious Enticement of Facebook Groups
At one time, forums were a great source of information and networking. To this day, when I search for medical information, I usually find the best info in old forums. But these forums have slowly been replaced by social media and, now, Facebook groups. Apparently everyone likes having groups on Facebook because it puts it all in the one place everyone is using constantly tethered to every hour of the day so it’s easy to just check in with your (insert some topic here) group. So forums have slowed or disappeared. I’ve tried to start up a forum here on my site and it’s so difficult to get traction. People do everything on Facebook because Facebook has made it so easy, addictive, and convenient. (See video above.) It takes actual effort to click over to a website or forum rather than mindlessly scrolling down a Facebook feed that has been purposely designed to keep your attention captive for extended periods of time. I know that there are people I interact with almost every day on social media that I would probably rarely interact with again if I left Facebook. That’s just the reality.
One of the problems I have with Facebook groups is that they are not a good long-term repository of information like a forum. They are harder to search. They move more quickly. Members come and go all the time. The same information gets shared over and over again because things move so quickly and search results are not as helpful as in a forum or even a website/blog. When I joined some Facebook groups, I wanted to help people and so I would answer questions when I knew the answer. And then it disappeared down the group feed in under twenty-four hours. It takes time to write up worthwhile answers over and over again. Facebook groups are horribly inefficient from that standpoint.
I’ve set up a Facebook group for my website twice. I started one in the summer of 2016 and it got up to around 100 members. We had nice interactions and a lot of lovely people in there. I shut it down because I felt like it was too much for me to juggle one more thing. Fast forward to early autumn of 2017 and I re-opened it, determined that I had to make it work. But it doesn’t work for me. It fragments my thinking. It causes me to use up my writing capacity for the day in discussions that are here today and gone tomorrow. There are times I go into my group to start a conversation for the day and by the time I’m done interacting for an hour or so that morning, I’m DONE. My brain is tired, I’ve written a lot, and then I have nothing much left to give to my website the rest of the day. So my website content is neglected and the work I put into writing in the group is pretty much gone forever. Read by a few people and then it disappears.
My ability to read widely, synthesize what I read from a variety of topics and places, and write for others in a way that brings all that together is my THING. It is what I do really well. It is what I enjoy. And when I have to keep up a Facebook group (and page), it slowly and steadily sucks away my brain power, my processing power, my writing power, etc. (See video above.) If I’m going to do deep work that benefits others, then I need the ability for sustained focus. And a place where I focus. That place can never effectively be a Facebook group. In fact, devoting time to maintaining a Facebook group (and engaging people on a Facebook page) works directly against creating excellent content and products for here.
FOMO and FOEUB
It’s said that one of the reasons people don’t quit Facebook is FOMO (fear of missing out). I think that is true. But as a business owner it is also about FOEUB (fear of ending up broke).
You might think I’m joking, but I’m not. I do a lot of professional connecting on Facebook. I do a lot of networking. I would have to give all that up and it makes me wonder how it would negatively impact our business. (That is one advantage I’m assuming Heather and Sue had that I don’t – their entire household income isn’t dependent on their online endeavors.)
So, yes, it is partly professional fear that keeps me on Facebook. Sad, isn’t it? But I’m being honest.
I don’t think it’s great that companies like Facebook (and Amazon and Google) dominate everything. I don’t think it is in our culture’s best interest at all. But everyone falls in line and gobbles up their services, furthering their stranglehold on everyone personally and professionally.
When the topic of quitting Facebook or social media comes up with other bloggers, responses generally fall into a few camps:
- You cannot run a successful business and not be on Facebook. Period. Social media is here to stay so you might as well make peace with this necessary evil and invest time and energy in using it in a way that will work for you.
- (Blank look on face) – Why would you not want to be on social media? (This person is almost always under 30/35 and knows nothing of life without being online.)
- I want to leave it too. I’m so sick of it.
A part of me wants to leave Facebook to prove it can be done. To prove that it is possible to run a successful business and not be enslaved to Mark Zuckerberg and his company’s soulless algorithms that have the ability to make changes on a whim with no reference to the impact it can have on an individual’s business or family.
Actually, I want to prove that you can be more successful without wasting energy on soul- and time-sucking social media just as Newport says in the video above. I know without a doubt that old-fashioned blogging had far more to offer many people than what passes for community today on social media. Frankly, sometimes I miss parts of life before the internet.
So I’m not sure what I’ll do long-term (and I certainly can’t tell anyone else what they should do in their particular situation). I’ve contemplated quitting Facebook for twelve weeks and seeing how it goes. I’ve been reading The 12 Week Year and I can see the wisdom in applying the concept here and only quitting for twelve weeks to start. I’ve been convinced for a long-time about the wisdom of not building your online home on a rented lot which is why I also sell my products on my site and not just Teachers Pay Teachers. It’s why I keep an email list so I can keep in touch with my readers without needing anyone else’s “permission” or needing to pay money to boost a post on Facebook so the people who have chosen to follow my Facebook page can actually see what I’ve written.
The bottom line for me as a writer and creator of educational products is the desire to encourage and help others. If I were to talk to someone in real life, I would want to invite her into my home for a cup of coffee and sit by the fire and chat. I have always thought of my blog/website as my online home and it’s where I want to invite people to join me.Categories: Cozy & Simple Living
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Spot on! I agree with all of this. It’s a daily goal of mine to try not to be online too much; if I go on facebook, I am easily sucked in. I avoided it for several years at the beginning. I jumped onto my husband’s page to save time/instead of setting my own page/identity. I used it initially to be a contact point for a ministry I serve; he uses it less than me/for networking. I’ve tried to stick to my custom lists to avoid the feed, but then I don’t. Etc… I want out too but sometimes think – FOMO. :/ Part of my trouble is my own compulsion to answer/inform/correct… it drives me crazy to leave ignorant posts alone instead of informing with facts/suggesting fact checking – ha! Funny, not funny. It has been horrible for 2 years – before and after 2016 election. It just feeds that whole mess. I want to live again – in the real non-facebook world! For the record – my 3 young adults in their 20’s, use it very little, and say that the baby boomers & older – esp. women, have ruined facebook, and also that they feed the narcissism of the millennials by constantly praising them/their posts/photos. I’ve observed this. There’s a fine line between encouraging and over-praising + we don’t always know the personality/weaknesses of those we’re trying to encourage – because why? – in truth – they’re not really friends. But this can also be a problem on discussion boards….
Susan,
That’s really interesting how your children view Facebook and how they think it feeds the narcissism of millennials. I had not read that anywhere, but I can see how that could be the case in some circumstances. I completely agree with wanting to live again the real non-Facebook world. It’s so easy to get sucked into it all. My feed stopped working months ago and we haven’t been able to fix it. It has made it easier to start breaking away a bit.
Thanks for your comment!
This is so good. I have been contemplating getting rid of my smartphone for the new year, but upon reading this, I realize that what I really need to get rid of is social media. I am too sensitive to it and yet compelled to keep checking it. I find that internal struggle to be very draining. I have five kids whom I homeschool, and I need to conserve energy for them. Also, I find that I waste so much time scrolling and commenting that I am looking forward to using that time in a more productive and creative way. Thank you for this post – it gaven me the push I needed to delete these things from my phone and take (at least) a 12-week break from social media. I plan to document the changes that happen on my blog, which has not gotten much attention lately.
Eileen,
We dropped our landline and switched to a smart phone a little over two years ago. I do like having access to the internet whenever we go out so I don’t think I would give it up. That said, I had FB Messenger on there for a bit and took it off. I don’t have email on it. I have Pinterest because it is an easy way to do some pinning when I’m waiting somewhere (which is getting some work done for me). I also have FB on there and haven’t quite gotten to the point of taking it off.
One thing I didn’t mention in the article is I did delete my LinkedIn account a couple of weeks ago. That was just a waste of time and mental energy to get those constant notifications reminding me to do things like congratulate someone I barely know on her ninth anniversary at her current job. THAT was the email from LinkedIn that pushed me over the edge to delete it.
And I completely agree about conserving energy for our children. That’s a challenging balance to create.
I’ve slashed my Facebook time because it was making me crazy. I just use it personally, but I cut down to 4 friends and some mom groups. I limit my time to 15 minutes a day or less, but I often find myself skipping days because there’s not much activity and that’s the way I like it.
Cassie,
It sounds like you’ve found a good balance! I’d like to get to the point I could be on it 15 minutes a day and even skip days.
One step at a time! The first step was getting this post written! LOL! But I am VERY glad I took off FB messenger and stopped all FB notifications on my phone. My mind is MUCH quieter without all the notifications.
I love this. I read the articles. Last June was my best month (health/emotionally/spiritually)- the month I was off FB. Gearing up to go off again. A movie I wanted to watch (and am watching now!) is called, “The Circle”. It is currently prime on Amazon. It is like FB on steroids…. and yet not too far off. I had NO idea of what it was about- it seemed timely to share.
Kelley,
I saw that movie on Prime, but haven’t watched it. The premise and preview were creepy enough. Let me know what you think of it when you are done. Maybe I will try to sneak it in.
Thanks for the first-hand feedback about being off Facebook. Have you thought about leaving it completely or do you find just taking a break once in a while is enough? It takes discipline to leave without deleting so well done to you!
If I go off again, I think it will have to be for good. Discipline and I are not on good terms…but I’m working on it. I have to tie up loose ends as I am currently the owner of my former church’s FB page, and last I checked, I can’t just transfer over a page. So I have to call the pastor and give him time to deal with that.
Ah, the movie. Overall good. I like the movie ending, polar opposite from the book, according to the sidenote on my kindle screen. Minimal offensive language. At one point it made me think I was watching the biblical one world order coming together. Sheesh!
I did read something that the movie was not true to the book, but a polar opposite ending seems odd!
So I’ve returned three times to read this, and struggled each time.
75% of the time, I am frustrated with Facebook and all social media, for many of the reasons you’ve mentioned. (I’m not in a business position, so at least that is not an issue!)
But there are real people I’ve come to know through it (that are not nearby) and the instantaneousness of communication with them through social media is wonderful.
This ultimately keeps me from giving it up. I may just drop the groups and quit following the pages for awhile. Or close my current account and start one with just people.
But something must give. 💖
Cristy,
And that’s the love/hate aspect of social media, isn’t it? It can provide some good, but it also impacts us in negative ways. The part that is most insidious to me is the way social media (Facebook, in particular) manipulates us with algorithms and so on. It’s not a neutral experience. We really don’t control it as much as we think we do.
That and the fact that I think it takes us away from our local communities. Rather than investing time with those around us, we spend it with people in far away places. It’s both amazing and disturbing. Even you and I having this conversation. It’s amazing we can connect over the distance over shared life needs and experiences. But we’re both not investing in people in real life.
We had this same discussion re: Amazon at Christmas and how much money leaves our communities. Someone pointed out on my Facebook wall discussion that all the money everyone sends out to Amazon doesn’t stay in the local community to pay for important services that we all expect.
As a society, we really have no idea how this will all shake out long-term.
This is really an excellent point. We live in a dying town. It was once a thriving New England town- river and mills. a corner store every few blocks, the butcher, baker, etc. (we had a candle shop too…). By my “lifetime”- there were a few shops left and now not so much.
There is a Revitalize Three Rivers committee and funds are coming in, a new restaurant just opened, we have an art studio, an historic center that is bringing culture and arts to our community and the chamber of commerce does events throughout the year. Three Rivers is a village of Palmer (there are 4 villages in Palmer) and even in our village there are “sub-villages”.
My dream would be to open a coffee shop. I’ve had many jobs in my short lifetime and my favorite was working in my friend’s mom’s coffee shop on main street Palmer when I was in high school. Everyone in town would love to see a coffee shop/ breakfast nook (the other restaurant does lunch/dinner)- so I’m sure I’d see a good bit of business and I know the chamber would support me in many ways.
BUT- I also have a secret love/addiction to nice pens and thick paper. I love to write…the feel of the pen against the paper, the flow and rhythm of the words. Glitter colored pens for highlighting and emphasis. Would there be a place for me in town for this? Would people value quality writing supplies, quality calendars, quality books, etc? I fear that the answer is no. Because the last local book store (10 minutes away) closed over 5 years ago… honestly driving to any bookstore (even Barnes and Noble) is a 30 minute drive. I too find I use Amazon for these things. If someone were local, I can honestly say, I would buy there. I would buy LESS and pay more for the quality AND the service.
We try to do this whenever we can… we did it with the revision/remodel of our house 12 years ago- all our plumbing supplies came from a family business in Palmer. You know what? I don’t think we paid more though…and the customer service was and is amazing.
So you make a good point and made me think that I’m going to bring this up at our chamber of commerce meeting next week. ;o) How far would we be willing to go? What kinds of stores would we really support to make our town thrive again?
With the ability for people to work remotely, it would seem like an ideal time for smaller towns to make a push to entice people to move there. It’s not like you have to bring in tens of thousands of people to have a positive impact. And as you said, just shopping locally can make a big difference as well.
That would be so neat if you could open your shop! Let us know what develops!
Hi Sallie, I was the one who pointed out the loss of local sales tax revenue when we shop online. It has really affected our local employment; number of municipal jobs- salaries 100% paid by local tax dollars- have decreased steadily over the last 15 years, due to budget cuts… but everyone expects the same or even more services… though there are far fewer employees to provide them. The complainers in the newspaper/facebook page will also complain about the tax being higher for restaurants and will drive across the river to the other smaller town in next county and spend their $ there to save a few pennies or dollars. There is a complete disconnect. It’s like the bad/sad part of “It’s a Wonderful Life” – no one knows what a difference they can make, until they are gone- if we don’t support local area, our whole local world will change and not for the better.
Susan,
Yes, and it was such a great comment that I thought was applicable here. People have no concept that when they spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on Amazon each year that that money does absolutely nothing to help their community and neighbors. It’s so complicated though. So many people struggling to make ends meet and need to save however they can. But it’s short-sighted and ultimately hurts them in the long-run. There are no easy answers.
I deleted my personal account on Facebook along with my blog’s page. I do have an account I use for groups for blogging, but I have the newsfeed turned off so the few friends I do have, I don’t see anything of there. Time is precious and Facebook kills time.
Hi Lori!
It sounds like you’ve reached a good balance that works well for you. That is great! Yes, Facebook is an epic time killer in the worst sense of the phrase.
I clicked over to your website and saw that you are part of the Bible Gateway Blogger Grid. I had never heard of that, but the logo caught my eye because I love the audio Bible on the Bible Gateway Kindle app. I like listening to George W. Sarris read the Bible. Very relaxing and encouraging.
I am massively cleaning out my bookmarks folders today and came across some quitting Facebook related links I didn’t include in my post. I’m going to include them here for future reference when people are reading this post and the comments. These are from before all of the data security issues popped up. I’m sure there many more now.
7 Reasons Why Quitting Facebook Now Is Good For Your Future
The Acceleration of Addictiveness
Former Facebook exec says social media is ripping apart society
How a handful of tech companies control billions of minds every day | Tristan Harris
The Age of Notifications and Attention-Deficits
Why Copyblogger Is Killing Its Facebook Page
Should You Delete Your Business Facebook Page?
Should Your Business Say Goodbye to Facebook?
Is Facebook a Modern Day Cult?
How Facebook Rips Off Businesses
Sallie,
You’re very kind calling me your blogging hero. That makes me smile especially as I often feel I’m failing at blogging. I spend a lot of time and effort trying to create content that is different and helpful, but often I don’t get the feedback that makes it all worthwhile.
I told you that I returned to Instagram several weeks ago and it’s been an interesting experience. I get new followers every day (I don’t have a big account) and people stop by to like and comment. It’s easy to get an unschooling conversation started on Instagram compared to my blog. That’s where everyone is. Another positive: a lot of my content is perfectly suited to Instagram. It’s a good place to share my photos and videos which I enjoy making. (I did try putting together my own photo galleries on my blog, but I think I was the only person enjoying them.) But concentrating on photos and videos distracts me from writing. And surely it’s the longer meatier articles which will help people the most?
Although I’m reaching more people via Instagram, I fear I may end up getting overwhelmed and then want to retreat from everything I’m doing. I can only survive in that environment for so long before I crash. I’d much rather do things on my own terms on my blog. But what’s the point of doing that if few people make the effort to visit?
It’s frustrating that social media has such a huge influence on the success of businesses. I might not have a business I’m trying to promote, but I do want to attract Patreon patrons. The extra income will help support what I’m doing online. And then I can continue helping other people which is my aim and why I keep trying to find the best way to do things. Talking about podcasting, people may prefer social media to blogs, but they also like to listen. Podcasting is popular.
One good thing: I have no regrets about leaving Facebook. I am so relieved I no longer have an account. I feel like a big weight has been removed from my life because I am free of it. Maybe I shouldn’t have been tempted to return to Instagram.
It’s been so good to share thoughts with you. I hope we find a solution to our social media problem!
Hi Sue!
The content on your site is AMAZING. Really. I have found it so helpful as I’ve sorted out where we are in our homeschooling journey. You are farther along than I am, but I relate to much of what you write. The things you wrote about unschooling doesn’t mean the parent can’t actively influence were very helpful for me. And I ***think*** I’m finally getting the Evernote stuff.
I take terrible pictures so Instagram is not a temptation for me. I have an account, but have never done anything with it. I wish I had learned to take better photos before Caroline was born. That’s one of my biggest regrets. Now it’s simply one more thing to do and it always falls down in the list of priorities. So I pretty much avoid Instagram. It’s too much for me. Too many polished photos that don’t encourage me. But I can see why people enjoy it.
You said: “I’d much rather do things on my own terms on my blog. But what’s the point of doing that if few people make the effort to visit?”
I told David that I have to be the change I want to see happen and so that’s why I’m making the changes I’m making. I am leaving Facebook in a few days and started telling people last night and today. Now that the decision is made, I am GIDDY at the thought of being out of there. It sucks me dry in so many ways.
I’m also making a concerted effort to begin commenting more regularly on the blogs I enjoy. I do think there is a shift coming and there are enough people who are ready for a change to shake things up. I’m guessing that we are ahead of the curve with these things. I don’t think everyone is going to abandon FB for blogs, but I think there are enough people who will to make a real difference. Time will tell.
David came across this article today and shared it with me. Two of the money quotes:
“The problem with Facebook is that its managed to gain such a monopoly on our digital presence that we worry about quitting it. Switching from Foursquare to Yelp doesn’t give anyone anxiety, but deleting Facebook does.”
“Facebook has become the abusive partner in many people’s lives. They’ve carved out such a seemingly important role in your life that even though you want to leave, you’re scared of the consequences.”
Yes, You Should Delete Facebook
And then how to do it…
How to delete your Facebook account
Sallie,
Thank you for your kind words about my blog. I’m glad you’re finding it helpful. Maybe it is worthwhile taking the time and effort to put together a blog.
Thank you also for the links to the articles about Facebook. It’s worrying. I’m glad I deleted my account. I hope it all works out well when you delete yours. I think the idea of clicking the ‘delete’ button, knowing that everything is going to disappear is the scariest part. Once I’d done that, I felt only relief. btw, I saved all my FB data before I hit ‘delete’. I’ve actually looked at it a few times. Sometimes I search for things that I posted on my FB page and want to use again.
I know Instagram is owned by Facebook and if I’m worried about my privacy, I should have deleted that account too. I’ve been thinking a lot about this. One minute, I’m ready to leave Instagram, the next I’m not so sure. I’m connecting with a lot of people who are interested in unschooling while I’m posting my photos, spreading an idea here and there. But at what cost? I get so involved with social media, I don’t have to time to write blog posts. Which is more important? I think my blog and podcast should really be my focus. But then again… I go round and round in circles. There are a lot of unschoolers who don’t have blogs but share their thoughts and ideas via Facebook and Instagram posts. They have far more reach than me because they are prepared to go where everyone is gathering. It’s discouraging and complicated!
Yesterday, I created a Blogagram page on my blog. It’s a gallery of my Instagram photos with captions. If I do leave Instagram, I don’t want to lose everything. And maybe some readers who aren’t on Instagram might like to scroll through my photos.
We have to be the change we want to see happen? Oh yes. Perhaps commenting more on other blogs, networking and collaborating, producing good content… I’d like to do all that. Maybe we could share ideas and encouragement?
It’s been so good chatting with you!
Hi Sue,
Have you looked into SEO much? That can be a tremendous help in bringing people to your site. You have such an excellently defined niche (unschooling) that I would think you would do very well with Google if your posts were optimized for SEO.
I find that focusing on SEO and Pinterest is more than enough to keep me busy. And the bonus is neither one comes with drama, interpersonal conflict, etc. LOL!
So I just deleted my account. WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sallie,
Big cheer!!! Goodbye Facebook!!! Do you feel free? I hope so.
SEO? Yes, I’ve been thinking about that. I have installed the Yoast plugin and I’m trying to optimise my posts for Google search. I think I already get most of my traffic from Google, but I could do better! I also like Pinterest. I started using Pinterest-friendly post images a long time ago. It’s good to share ideas with you. Thank you for your suggestions!
Hooray!!!!! I’m happy for you, and will be joining you in the “DeFacebook Movement” after Thursday! (We have one more event to attend that day.)
Kudos to you for encouraging me to do this. Such a peace lately.
Oh my word. The withdrawal is weird and real. I honestly didn’t think I would feel that way this morning. I told David I’m going to keep a running post of the first thirty days off and see how it goes. I’m honestly surprised I feel it this much already. All the more reason to break the hold it has on me. CRAZY!!!
YES! YES! YES! I was off this past month w/ the exception of linking 3 posts and then responding to ONE post my husband made.
The withdraw was painful….for about 5 days. Literally painful. I kept praying and remembering it is okay to feel the pain, walk though the pain, live with the pain: it will pass.
I’m so GLAD for you (not the pain, the quitting!).
I made a long post last week in response to something my husband wrote and then on Friday I was a mental mess. There were other factors I believe (the perfect storm, if you will) but I’m beginning to wonder how much getting back on, writing that (opinion) post affected me. Because really, who needs my opinion? It really only served me. (gasp!)
I’m trying to figure out how to get rid of messenger so that folks don’t contact me via that and thus re-activate my account. I’m open to suggestions!!
Hi Kelley!
I’m actually glad for myself for the pain of quitting. It confirms why I need to quit. If I quit and felt nothing I think it would make me question if it really is that difficult.
It’s also making me rethink how I allow Caroline to use electronics, but one issue at a time. LOL!
I have a lot of thoughts to share about why Facebook is a bad fit for some people, but I’m going to wait and write them in a post. Not to harp on people who still use it, but because the entire thing fascinates me from a spiritual and cultural standpoint. I do think Facebook is a TERRIBLE fit for people who are INFJs. It’s the worst.
I had messenger on my phone for a month? Two? I can’t remember. I deleted that thing right away. Could not stand being that connected. I also deleted the Facebook app a number of months ago. That was my first step in walking away. I did not want to be checking Facebook when I left the house and yet I found myself doing it. Removing the app was the first step for me.
Keep us posted how you are doing!
Sallie
Happily working and living post-Facebook. LOL!
I started a post and was jotting down my thoughts each day. I thought about making it live and adding to it each day and then wondered if that was stupid. So I’m typing up thoughts each day and maybe at some point I’ll make it public.
No regrets for my choice at all.
Deleted. Whew. Does this mean we will have ‘deletaversaries’?
Hi Kelley!
Congrats! We should have a little party. LOL!
Your experience may vary, but I’ve been much more productive this week and my mind has been quieter. So win-win overall.
It does feel weird to think of things, though, and not have the ability to check Facebook. But it passes.
Sallie
Hooray! And yes, I think we should have a party!
And my first full day is today, sans-Facebook. It’s like being rested again …
Hi Cristy!
Woo hoo! It’s a little party!
Sallie
I am nearing the end of a 90 day “Facebook cleanse” that started on February 4th. I started it after reading this post and most of the articles you have links to. Thank you for posting this. I hadn’t realized how much of my time FB was consuming.
Hi Cheryl,
I have had such a productive week since Monday. Part of it is the time I’m not on Facebook. But an even bigger part of it, I think, is how much I’m not thinking about things I’ve seen on Facebook. It would suck so much of my mental energy that I need for other things (parenting, homeschooling, work, etc.). I think many people are in denial about how much Facebook steals from their lives until they really try to go without it.
I’m glad this post and the links were helpful!
Sallie
Very helpful and insightful. Thanks Sallie!
Great article! I agree with you! I am not on Facebook at all. People don’t get why I’m not on it. The only thing I don’t get by being on it is contact with my side of the family, other than that it doesn’t really bother me. I also don’t like the garbage that is on Facebook and the seemingly addictive nature of it. I am on LinkedIn for our business, but really don’t spend that much time on it. Our smartphones are our home phones, but admittedly spend too much time wasted on it. My son is in his last 3 years of high school as I homeschool and I need to make the most of it. Bless you for your insight.
Hi Kris,
I’m glad you liked the post. I was on LinkedIn and left a few months before I quit Facebook. (I thought I would start with an easy one that I rarely used.) I still have a Twitter account, but I only use it to share my posts, watch animal videos with Caroline, and catch sports highlights/recaps. And weather. I find Twitter annoying to use in the extreme for discussions so it’s not even a temptation to me. I do like Pinterest and don’t see myself ever giving that up. The nice thing about Pinterest is there is no social aspect to maintain. It’s basically a search engine now so it works well for me. Our smart phone is our home phone as well. I resisted getting one, but I do really like being able to take our home phone with us when we go out since it is also the phone we use for our business. And it’s handy to look things up while out and about. But I don’t use it for much else other than checking the weather or doing some pinning on Pinterest if I’m bored somewhere. And Starbucks. LOL!
Sallie
This is such a great post. I deactivated my Facebook account almost 2 years ago and felt so free after doing it. After reading through the comments here today, I decided to log back in and delete my account. I had to admit I had several notifications including PM’s and I was SO tempted to click and see what they were. I didn’t and deleted it straight away. I do have an Instagram account still, but I just post my pretty planner pics or safe food pics. That’s it. I have been contemplating even deleting that.
One day I’d like to find time to consistently blog again, but for now I stay completely busy with homeschool, homemaking and cooking all of our meals. (Both me and my daughter have food allergies and my daughter’s food allergies are very severe and she doesn’t eat out.)
Anyway, thanks for the nudge to finally go from a deactivated FB account to a deleted one!
Hi Blessed!
Congratulations on going from deactivated to deleted!
Cooking for food allergies is so time consuming. I have something similar and am unable to eat out at all. It definitely changes your life.
Thanks for letting us know you joined our little quitting Facebook club! LOL!
Sallie
I decided to make public the running list of thoughts I had about quitting Facebook.
I Quit Facebook – My First 30 Days
I wasn’t sure where to put this so I’m putting it here.
New book coming out: Ten Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media Accounts Right Now
Interview with the author, Jason Lanier: ‘One Has This Feeling of Having Contributed to Something That’s Gone Very Wrong’
Very interesting quote from the article:
You have a new reader! I found you through an ad in The Old Schoolhouse, I think that was the one. I saw the word cozy and decided to check out your site. I haven’t been so pleased with one in a while. Thank you for the information you share here.
The post on first 30 days without facebook was great and the one on being nonhygee (lol!), this one is good too! I am so glad I found it.
Hi Christi!
It’s nice to meet you! Thank you for telling me you found me through The Old Schoolhouse. I hope you find lots of encouragement here. I apologize it took me a few days to respond to your comment. I usually try to respond the same day, but I got way behind the past few weeks. LOL!
Welcome!
Sallie