A few years ago I wrote a post about Introverts in the Church that generated quite a bit of discussion. I was bouncing around the web recently and came across What’s it like to be an introverted woman in church circles? This question was asked by Adam McHugh, the same man who authored the book I profiled in my previous post, Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture.
For the past few weeks I’ve been going back to read the comments on this newer post because they go on and on and on and on and on…. This topic clearly hit a nerve. There are so many comments. So many long comments.
There are so many good comments I couldn’t even begin to highlight some of them. So many good stories. So many good insights.
Introverted Women Struggling in Church
It is stunning to see how many quality women struggle with being truly engaged in the local church. I think of the wealth of wisdom and passion that gets completely missed by local congregations because there isn’t a meaningful way to plug these women into the heart of the church. The church is losing so much by not understanding how to integrate and appreciate introverted women.
Even worse than not utilizing their gifts, many of them feel judged or marginalized because of their introversion. It is taken for coldness or snobbery. There’s a clear pattern that is obvious in the comments.
Churches and church leadership apparently have a significant problem with understanding introverted women and what makes them tick.
Church is Exhausting for Introverted Women
I was also struck by how many of the women said they often didn’t even want to go to church because it is too exhausting. I soooo relate to this. I think I’ve even written about it on here, but can’t remember where off the top of my head. There are many weeks that the thought of going to church is simply depressing because I honestly don’t have anything left to give and don’t want to have to be friendly and what feels to me like being fake.
Church life is so geared toward extroverts whether it is progressive dinners, potlucks after the service, camping trips, women’s retreats, or what have you. It’s really unfortunate that this is the reality for so many of God’s daughters each week.