First of all, you all need to stop saying how much you are going to miss me. Just about every time I read that I either get misty or I feel like a heel.
And when I think about continuing as a parent without my panel of experts (my reading friends) I get a little panicky! Honestly. I’ve thought more than once – what am I going to do when I have a parenting question and I don’t have my blog? You all are the best advice givers. And I know the advice you give helps others as there are lots of moms with little ones who read here too.
So… help!
First thing… After doing some reading online I think we have determined that we have a high needs baby as it relates to sleep. By that I mean the normal bedtime routine route that everyone says should work, doesn’t. She is so curious about everything that it is like her brain will not shut down. I think the fact that it is light so late probably doesn’t help much either. I remember being like this as a child so maybe she comes by it naturally. She has to be almost exhausted before she will take a bottle and go to sleep. I know everyone says you shouldn’t put babies down when they are asleep, but at night it is almost like we have no choice. Anyone else have a baby like this and care to offer suggestions?
And the other thing… Caroline has no interest in anything beyond her Stage 2 baby foods. Tried Stage 3 a few times and she either gagged or looked at it and wouldn’t even open her mouth. I’ve tried Cheerios, those baby puff things, food off our plates… Nothing. I’ve tried eating with her, giving them to her to play with… Nothing. This is a child who loves to eat and puts everything in her mouth. So is she just not ready? She’ll be ten months next week and I’d love to get her out of baby food soon!
Thank you in advance from two perplexed parents!
Deciding To Have An Only Child
I gave four of my five kids a bottle (of milk) at bedtime. Their teeth were fine.
I gave my fifth an extra one in the middle of the night – bad teeth problems. I felt confident it wouldn’t hurt her because of the first four. I am so sorry about those second bottles!
None of my children wanted to go to bed at night.
I’d put them to bed at about the same time, and I’d let them cry for some time. Not forever. Perhaps you are comfortable with ten minutes, or twenty. Usually, they get used to “putting themselves to sleep.”
If you really feel they need you or that something is unusual about their cry, of course, follow your instincts.
I can’t think of anything to add to what you and I have already discussed about the sleep issue. My daughter (first born) was that way and still has the most trouble getting to sleep at night. A routine bedtime and as little interaction as possible after I put her down is about the only thing I can think of that’s worked. The more I tried to “soothe” her the wider awake she got.
With the food, I would stop trying the new textures altogether, give her a couple of weeks, then try again with something just a little more lumpy than what she likes. Get her used to that and go ve-e-e-ry slowly, gradually adjusting to a little more texture.
Check “Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems” by Dr. Richard Ferber. Worked like a miracle for all four of my babies, and they were all tricky sleepers.
And my oldest son would not touch a Cheerio or a diced carrot or any solid food until he was…I kid you not…15 months old. We thought something was seriously wrong. Turns out he’s just picky about food texture, and he he still is, at the age of 10!
Have you thought about feeding her the same food you and your hubby eat at dinner? Maybe she doesn’t like the “difference”…THEY do KNOW!
I can hardly believe that I am saying this……it has been 28 years ago!….but I was given a gift much like you.
My firstborn son took naps for the first month, then decided that the World was ‘A.much.too.exciting.place’ and everyone needed him, so he only slept when exhaustion took over. In my naivete I thought letting him create his own schedule was good mothering until a very wise lady shared with me about teaching your very young baby to learn to sooth himself and be happy and peaceful, even if awake. I learned to have routines, like the SAME story and SAME song for very specific quiet times or sleep times, and to not ever deviate from them….even though I may be bored with them. (I am talking about from six months on…)
Gradually I saw changes in Joel, a quieter more peaceful child and one who loves boundaries. He never did become a great sleeper, as he has too many interests and a mind that is fertile and highly developed. But he did learn to appreciate “quiet times” and was from an early age, one who any adult could have a delightful conversation with. He is now a very successful adult, who is about to become a father himself and is in terror! ;o)
The LORD will richly bless each and every day you share in training with your little Caroline. She will be a mighty womanly warrior in the Kingdom for God’s Glory……..do you know how I know that?
Because He (the One Who never slumbers or sleeps) really does hear all those prayers that go up during those long sleepless nights of yours!
sh-sh-sh…sleep tight……..
Our Dr. told us that most babies do not do well with the stage 3 baby food because there are chunks mixed in with the pureed. They don’t know whether to chew or swallow and have not developed the skill to do both at the same time. We fed Holly stage 2 baby food until she was one. The stage 3 fruit is the same as the stage 2 (no chunks) but stage 2 offers much more variety. Holly is very sensative to texture. She still won’t eat regular applesauce (the non baby food kind) because the texture is too grainy. Weening her from baby food, to chunkier food, to table food has been a very slow process. It sounds like texture may be an issue for Caroline as well. One thing we learned is to introduce new foods very slowly. If we try to introduce too many in a short period of time, Holly is overwhelmed and shuts down. Continue to feed Caroline the foods she likes but also continue to offer her one type of finger food like Cheerios or a graham cracker. One day she may surprise you and pick it off her tray and eat it. Holly usually does this when our backs ar turned.:) Have you tried giving Caroline yogurt? Yogurt was one of Holly’s first table foods. She loves it!
I don’t remember. Perhaps a quiet toy and a Dark room. My boys went to sleep with bottles of water after they were about 10 MO’s. They liked to pacify themselves with the bottle, and I had a “thing” about pacifiers, but wasn’t willing to risk “bottle mouth”. Most of the time there would be half or more of a bottle of water left in the morning. it was mostly a comfort thing. of course they did try to amuse themselves with the bottle a few times too. thank goodness it was only water, I can’t imagine how I would have gotten 8 oz of milk out of the carpet.
Food wise I think a lot of babies don’t eat chunky food until they have nearly all their teeth (again sleep-deprivation induced amnesia)I’m guessing putting off true solids for a month or two would help. My oldest was at least 14 mo before he ate much “finger” foods.
I think it was about the same time we started giving nighttime bottles of water that we also began giving “the good stuff” milk, juice or whatever, in sippy cups. this was to create the association that bottles only held water and tasty things came in sippy cups. I really think it helped with the transition from bottle to cup.
I do second trying the “ferber method” (at least halfway) I tried it with my first he cried less that 1.5 min by the clock before going to sleep. EVERY TIME. but my second is another story altogether. we started with 2 min intervals and went to 5,10,15, and 30 min intervals between checking & reassuring and he still never went to bed without a 1 1/2 hr “cry time” so we went back to rocking because the entire household NEEDED to sleep.
Mrs N
We used the Baby Whisperer sleep technique with Seth since he was 2 weeks old, and it has worked for him, but we had to keep at it for a few weeks before it did. There were no instant results like she promised. =) This involved staying with him by the cradle or being in the room while he cried, and talking to him, but waiting a few minutes to get him up, then soothe him until he was calm, and put him back down, awake. Eventually, he understood that he wasn’t getting up, and that it was time for bed, and he stopped fighting us about going to sleep. But it wasn’t easy for me to do this, so I wouldn’t blame you if it seemed too challenging. My husband was better at doing this than me. But he does get put down at night wide awake, sometimes a little wired these days, and he goes to sleep quickly even then, so you could try it. I hope you find something that works. Good luck with everything. Nobody has THE answer for your Caroline except you, but hopefully you’ll come across something that helps you out.
We went straight from stage 2 to mashed up real food, they had whatever we were eating except mushier.
There was an elderly lady at our church who piped up when we discussing this same topic. She was a real Southern Lady, so her comment was especially funny because it seemed so incongruous. She said that she went straight from nursing to ground up table food with all our kids, “if God would have wanted them to have finely blended peas, He would have made me a third b**b with mashed peas in it.”
OK, that should have been all her kids.
And, I have no idea when they started liking real food. They’re 2 and 5 now, it seems like ages ago.
Hi, Sallie,
I’m another reader who will miss you, but I understand!
I second the moms who suggested that you keep Caroline on the food she tolerates and introduce new food slowly. If she needs more, she will eat it. Don’t worry about depriving her.
The sleep thing was tricky for us. Our pediatrician recommended the Ferber book to us, too. Our daughter did OK with the “cry it out” routine. It was much more difficult for our son. It went against all my instincts to make him cry and cry and cry. Both of our children came to us through adoption, and in hindsight, I think he was suffering from abandonment issues at bedtime. He wasn’t traumatized in the long term (God’s grace!) and is a healthy, happy, wonderful thirteen-year-old, but I wish I had handled it differently in retrospect.
This is all to say that I think after you ask for advice, read, and pray, you should trust your instincts. God gave Caroline to you and David. He gave you and David to Caroline. You know what’s best for her. Have a balance between worrying, “Will she still do this when she’s 18?!” and being confident that, “Even though the baby book says she’s supposed to be _______, I think we should ___________ instead!”
God bless you all!
Sallie,
My little girl didn’t like the Stage 3 either! So she continued on Stage 2 and cheerios (she didn’t have a problem with them) until about 12 months when I switched her over to table food completely (it was actually so much simpler!). Of course, “real” food had been gradually introduced, like mashed potatoes, mashed bananas, etc. Oh, she loved mashed carrots!
While I have to admit that while she was a textbook baby and didn’t have too many issues sleeping, I think a lot of it had to do with the sleep schedules we used as guidelines. I’m not a structured person, but I think this is really needed in a baby’s day (well, imagine getting lost in the endless sleeping eating, changing mess with no bearings!?!). I don’t know if your structured with her naps throughout the day, but at 10 months, my munchkin had a morning and afternoon nap, two hours apart and starting 2 hours after she woke up. Then she went to bed about 5 hours after she woke up from her last nap. But that was just what worked for US. I certainly know that every child’s different.
Now you want to hear my mean parent tactic? The only way I know of to just get them to go down, is to do the routine, give them what they need to relax (swaddling when newborn, a special blanket, or a pacifier, etc.), put them in bed, and then LET THEM CRY, if that is their wish. I know, it seems cruel. But as someone already said, sooner of later they realize that they aren’t getting out, so they can either enjoy the quiet time of sleep. This is especially hard if neither of you have been accustomed to this, though Caroline’s a bright one… she’d catch on eventually.
Again, I don’t know if any of this is helpful to you. I don’t know what you already do, and I only skimmed the comments you’ve already received. But I do wish you many peaceful evenings and Happy Zzzz’s. =o)
For the food, the thing that helped my kids get over that hurdle of accepting non-pureed food was those little Gerber meals, Graduates, the white turkey stew one.
Daniel took a long time to eat a lot of ‘chunkier’ foods- I often wondered if he was behind and I should worry, but he is all caught up now- although he still choaks on raw carrot. He did not do at all well with soft and solid combinations (think puree food with bits in) and still will not touch pureed fruit with bits in- but loves solid fruit pieces! He did not get a lot of his teeth until a bit later which I think had something to do with it. He did (does) well with noodle and softer solids. Caroline will manage things in her own time I should imagine.
As for sleeping, Daniel always used to fall asleep when having his bottle and we would put him to bed. It has not had a bad effect. He now has a bath, cleans teeth, has a cup of milk and story at bed time and although he does not always go to sleep he stays (for the most part!) quietly in bed until he does drop off. I think it is one of those areas where you have to do what works rather than follow the ‘golden rules’ Smiles. Oh, and I promise no more ‘miss you’ comments 🙂
About the food: I seem to recall that my two went from baby food to mushed up “real” food – I don’t think they liked the stage 3 either. Just keep trying different things and don’t make a big production out of it–sometimes they will refuse if they get the feeling that it’s a big deal for YOU!
As far as going to bed, my mom found one of those made-for-toddlers cassette players (only had big On and Off buttons and no way for the child to remove the tape). I put them to bed with a story tape playing softly. They usually conked out after the first ten or fifteen minutes.
You are a smart mom, and Caroline seems to be a smart baby. You’ll both figure it out!!
Nita
We had a big struggle with one of our girls sleeping, too. I tried all sorts of things. (Crying it out only made her MAD!) What ended up working for us was putting her down earlier for her naps. When nap time was working better, she began going to sleep (and staying asleep) at night so much more easily. Now she’s our best sleeper.
And none of ours really cared for the Stage 3 foods. What I would suggest for Caroline is to stop all foods other than the Stage 2 that she likes. Then when she reaches over for something you or David are eating, offer her some (in appropriate sized pieces). Sometimes food is more appealing to little ones when it’s their idea!
And when all else fails, remember, this, too shall pass!
I think those babies that easily go to sleep after a little bedtime routine are almost entirely works of fiction, so I don’t compare my baby to them!
I can’t be of much help in the sleep department, because we breastfeed and cosleep. These days our bedtime routine is to do one last diaper change, go to bed, and let the baby wear herself out by climbing all over us, while we read. She thinks the bed is a great tumbling surface for babies. (The mattress is on the floor.) When she’s ready (often a little later than we’d like), she’ll nurse to sleep. Our baby has done well all along at sleeping at night, just barely waking up every couple of hours to latch back on for a little snack. The only “problem” nowadays is that she doesn’t sleep late in the morning much anymore; partly teething and partly the need to be up and doing things, I think.
Anyway, you only have to go through this once!!
As for food, we have been feeding her stage 1 and 2 foods (I wouldn’t buy baby food, but these were baby shower gifts), and give her a little of our food to try now and then, if it’s appropriate for babies. Mostly this is for practice, since she is still breastfeeding, but now that she is almost nine months old, and getting teeth and better motor skills, I suppose we should add some more solid foods for her. (Feeding baby food is so much slower and messier than breastfeeding!) We have a little food mill, but haven’t used it yet.
Hi Sallie,
I have kind of an odd book suggestion that may or may not help. I was introduced to it because my nephew has a sensory integration disorder. The book is called The Out-of-Sync Child. The strange thing about reading some of the book (I admit I didn’t read it all because my kids don’t actually have sensory disorders) was that I was able to pinpoint sensitivities in my own children. My oldest daughter was very strange about textures in her food and had a very strong gag reflex until she was two. My first two children both were born with extra-sensitive hearing (all that nonsense about vacuuming under the crib while they slept really didn’t help matters). They outgrew this, but, until then, naptime had to be completely silent. These sorts of things can be sensitivities, signs that the brain is actually too immature (for loud sounds while sleeping, or for strange textures in food). But the book also had some ideas for stimulating the brain that helped me out. Maybe it would help you, too.
As an aside, it really helped when, once my oldest daughter was a good walker, we would take her in the garden and have her pick our food, then take her in the kitchen and let her help make it. Somewhere in the process, she would start grabbing little veggie pieces and snacking on them. And sometimes she still choked herself, but eventually curiosity helped her overcome it.
Two of my three children have been “high needs” when it comes to sleep habits. One of my children came out of the womb knowing how to sleep and eat it seems, while the other two have been challenges indeed. As a matter of fact, I’m dealing with my 8 1/2 month olds sleep issues right now.
Both of my troublesome sleepers are like what you described. No routine seemed to work, and the Ferber Method was more of the Ferber Joke to them. (Although, I am in the throes of trying to let the baby do a little more crying it out in the middle of the night.) Any sort of bath before bed or gentle music overstimulates.
Honestly, all I’ve found that works is patience, time, consistency, and letting them cry when I know they’ve been fed, changed and need sleep. It’s like dieting – people can give you all the secrets, advice, and magic potions, but in the end, persistent sensibility and action are all that works. I have found no magic here. And sometimes, their personalities and characteristics cannot be “re-programmed” to fit into our own notions of what is normal. Period. Sometimes, I think, I just have to ask the Lord to adjust my attitude about the child’s issues or “problems”. Like with the sleep, I was losing lots of sleep myself trying to deal with baby’s sleep habits, and I finally got to the point that I had to ask God to see me through each day (all the chores just seem bigger and out of control when one is tired). I do believe relying on Him helped grow me a bit. Not that it was easy.
Here’s what I do:
At bedtime (for us, it’s 8 pm), I don’t give baby a bath. I simply carry her with me to the closet, get her pajamas out, change her diaper and put her pj’s on. Then we either sit the glider in her room with a board book to read a story, or we join Daddy and the boys in the other room for a story together. Once story has been read, we shut out the light and close the curtains. I sit in the glider and give her one last nursing for the night in the dark. Once she’s had some milk and seems to be calming, I put her in her bed (awake), cover her, put her little doll next to her, kiss her and say night-night, close her door and leave the room with a pleasant manner and smile on my face.
She ALWAYS cries. At least for 10 minutes. I have to leave the vicinity and try to go somewhere in the house (the garage? the front porch?) where I can’t hear her. After a bit, I stand near her room door and listen to make sure she’s quiet. If not, I don’t bother her.
If she’s sick, I obviously don’t use this “routine”. I wouldn’t call this much of a routine. It’s just regular, get-ready-for-bed behaviour.
This “method” sort of worked with my first child, but he’s 6 and still wakes at least once in the night to come sleep on the floor in our room. (Our rule is that the kids have to go to sleep in their own beds first.) We co-slept with the first, and it didn’t do any of us any favors. When I have to co-sleep with the current baby of the house (like when we go camping), she sleeps horribly. . . and so do I.
My infant likes to wake at 5:30 am to nurse. And then she wants to stay awake. This doesn’t work for me. So this past week, I came to the conclusion that I am the Mama, and I cannot let her totally and unreasonably control our household. I have been exhausted. She’s old enough to play and cry a bit in her crib in the morning until a reasonable waking time. So that’s what she’s been having to do. . . and oddly enough, on the third morning, she cried a tiny bit, played a little and then went back to sleep.
As for the food thing, the gag reflex may be a developmental thing. I have nieces (sisters) who gagged on all sorts of food until they were about 15 months old, but by 18 months, they were the best little eaters I’d ever known. Just be patient and keep trying stuff. I agree with the individual who said to try giving her some of your food. I give our 8 1/2 month old food from our plates. . . everything from tiny bits of soft chicken that I’ve pinched between my fingers, very small pieces of spinach, really soft bits of zucchini, etc. and she seems pleased to be eating the same stuff we do.
I don’t know any magic answers. If anything, being a mother has taught me that I know nothing about rearing children. I just have to depend on God.
Controlled crying worked wonders for us. The first two nights were rough, but on the third night, baby was out like a light the moment I put him in the crib. He was 9 months old at the time.
Google controlled crying if you are interested. Good luck.
Sallie,
My oldest was exactly like Carolyn. I bet she doesn’t like to be in a stroller either, but is happy in a cart where she can see everything!
I rocked him to sleep until he was about 18 months old. We got to a point that it was taking an hour to get him to sleep. I finally decided he was ready to go to sleep on his own so I rocked for a set amount of time and then put him down. FWIW, at eight he is an excellent sleeper and has no trouble falling asleep on his own. In fact, once he was ready to do it on his own that was that. Well, except when he decided he was done with the crib (but that is another story!) So, my point is: don’t be afraid of rocking her to sleep. At the time, there were nights that I really didn’t want to sit and rock for 30 minutes, but now it is one of my fondest memories.
Same child absolutely would NOT eat anything more solid than cereal until he was about 14 months old. I just kept trying every once in awhile and eventually he did eat more solid foods. I remember thinking I would be feeding him pureed carrots for the rest of his life! Unfortunately, he is (getting better, thank goodness) also more picky.
Good luck with the sleeping especially. I remember how frustrating that could be!
I forgot to mention that I played soothing music on a continuous loop most of the night. For some reason this seemed to help him if he woke during the night.
Oh, and I would also put sheets or towels up on the windows to make it dark. Not the prettiest thing, but did help them sleep better.
For baby food- are you anxious to have her out of it because of the expense? When I used baby-food, I used a baby-food mill. This is a little hand cranked tool and you can put anything you’re eating through it- something like a ricer, to make the smoother texture that some babies prefer. I did meat, vegetables, fruit- whatever we had at the table, I just put a couple spoonfuls into the baby-food grinder right there at the table and ground it up in a second. I loved that thing and used it for years after the babies were not babies to make very tender meat/cheese spreads and dips.
Also, I found that canned pumpkin- not pumpkin pie mix, but just plain canned pumpkin, worked great as a baby food, as did canned green beans and things like pears canned in their own syrup. They are the same texture and nutritional amount as baby food, but much, much cheaper. Just read labels to avoid extra salt and sweeteners.
An early ‘solid’ food we tried is rice cakes. Crumble one up and just give a few puffed rice pieces. These dissolve in the mouth so a baby with a pronounced gag reflex won’t choke on them.
Can’t help you with the sleep issues. My babies all slept with me because I slept better that way. I would say they did, too, but the truth is I only tried it any other way with the first one, and we both slept so much better with her next to me that I only once tried anything different with the rest. I am guessing that one of them might have done just as well either way.
I’m surprised you’re not supposed to put them down when they are sleeping. We did that all the time for daytime naps and things.
If getting her to sleep first and then putting her down works for you, I’d try it. The experts so often aren’t.
I too had never heard that you’re not supposed to put down a sleeping baby. I have a very active 7 month old and in this house we do what works – that means nursing or rocking to sleep and then laying him down very gently in his crib while still sleeping.
He is a great sleeper and most nights sleeps through the night, but he is just not the kind of baby who I could put down awake – way too active! I don’t have the heart for “cry it out” and I suspect it would just wind him up anyway, so right now we just do what works.
Probably a repeat, as I haven’t read everything, but on the food, I would just wait. Several of my children never had any food at that age! The last thing you want to do is push her. I had one baby who REFUSED to eat ANYTHING AT ALL until he was 16 months old! The first food he was willing to take was a bit of chocolate brownie! By that point, we were desperate!
But, he eats now (he’s 15). He’s still fairly picky, but he’s growing in his tastes…graaaaadually. He still loves chocolate, but he honestly will eat quite a few other foods too! 🙂
In any case, during the time when I felt pretty unnerved about him, I spoke to my friend who is a child psychologist. Her basic advice was: DO NOT MAKE AN ISSUE OF IT! The last thing you want to do is make a big emotional deal about food. It will backfire! She was dealing with several cases of children with severe eating issues…and the “pushing” by parents, she seemed to feel, was the real trouble.
He was also definitely my most high-need baby! I suspect it was just too new and different and strange to him (foods, in this case).
For your little girl, I suspect it’s partly just part of her personality, and probably she just isn’t ready. Maybe she’s ultra cautious! Or maybe her taste receptors are very strong. Or…?
But I recommend you not even try something new for a couple of weeks to a month or two…then just try making it available. Eventually I am sure she will eat! 🙂
Susan (mama to 8 from 25 to 4)
Some kids DO NOT “figure it out eventually” with the CIO method. My daughter, my firstborn, screamed for hours at every nap and every night – for seven months. The only thing that helped us was a change in her diet and therapy for sensory processing problems. She is extremely intelligent and has advanced cognitive thinking skills, coupled with a stubborn personality and sensory problems caused for sleeping nightmares, eating and weight gain problems and emotionally draining days. Just wanted to say that you’ll know if CIO is working for you and Caroline if after a few days, she’s crying less and settling down more. My daughter also had zero coping/self soothing skills. She would throw EVERYTHING out of her crib at eight months old and refuse any pacifier or bottle.
My son, who is now seven months old, will fuss a bit in bed, cry for a minute or three and then fall to sleep. If he’s startled awake, he’ll fuss for a few minutes, cry again maybe for a minute and then put himself back to sleep. I can tell if the CIO isn’t going to work for a naptime or bedtime for him because he will SCREAM for 20-30 minutes with no sign of stopping. I go in, rock him for a few minutes to calm him down and then try it again. It works like a charm.
I tell you this just to say that CIO does work. It just doesn’t work for all kids. And for the kids it doesn’t work for, it isn’t an indicator of intelligence, merely an underlying undiagnosed problem – or a really, really strong will.
My daughter is now 2 1/2 and as of about four months ago, began sleeping through the night and no longer wakes up for the day at 4 a.m. She is eating a bigger variety of textured foods (though some days are worse than others in both these areas). Overall, she has become significantly more internally calm for sleeping and falling back to sleep if she’s awakened and much more open to a variety of foods. We simply changed her diet. No gluten, no casein (she was found to be allergic to casein). She gained over a year’s worth of developmental skills in a matter of weeks.
Anyway, there’s my experience. For us, with my daughter that regularly would not CIO and would not sleep hardly at all (and yes, she was on a very consistent, organized schedule that flexed as her needs changed), she had underlying challenges that needed addressed. Ignoring it or trying to apply a method that worked for 95% of other parents was not the answer for us and we have had a huge payoff for our child as we watch her excel and exceed most of the developmental milestones of her peers.
I’m certainly not saying anything is going on with Caroline, other than a battle of wills. But you know your child’s personality and temperament better than anyone. If you even think there could be an underlying issue at hand, I would encourage you to set aside the typical parenting books (that NEVER applied to or worked for our daughter) and look into some medical help in the form of allergy testing (Is This Your Child, by Doris Rapp is a great start) as a beginning. Someone mentioned The Out of Sync Child as another good resource for ideas. A few more are, The Highly Sensitive Child by Aron, Sleepless in America by Kurcinka, and Raising Your Spirited Child, Kurcinka.
Sorry if this got long. I haven’t figured out yet how to share our experience without the details that seem to matter, but drag on. If you need or want anymore information, please email me – I’d be happy to share!