While walking on the treadmill, I’ve been working my way through Monarch of the Glen
I thought that was such an interesting exchange and have thought about it several times since. It also struck me because I’ve been debating for a while what to do with my old journals. Yes, they are interesting to go back and read, but I’m not sure I would want anyone else reading them. It is encouraging to see how much I’ve grown and it’s embarrassing to see some of the stupid things I obsessed over in years past.
So if I shred them, will I be sorry I did it in another twenty or thirty years? Or will it be cathartic to read them and shred them and move on in a sense?
Anyone want to share their thoughts on old journals?
How We Did Bottle Feeding
It’s interesting that you mention old journals … lately (as I’ve had time with 2, almost 3, little girls), I’ve been scanning them into my computer. I may never go back and read all of it, but I’ve enjoyed pulling up snippets every now then, looking at my high school handwriting and angst and remembering. 🙂
I recently debated this same thing. The deciding factor for me was realizing that I would give almost anything to be able to go back and read my own Mama’s journals (she threw them away). So I kept mine for my Pixie (Caroline’s age), just in case they might help her on her way or even entertain her in years hence:)
Oh, I think you should save them!! Caroline would probably treasure them in years to come. I wish desperately that my family had kept journals. I think I’m the only one on both sides of the family, and I don’t do it nearly as often I should.:(
I haven’t kept many journals, but I do make occassional entries. A few years ago I was reading one from college and I was quite embarassed by my immaturity. I actually did tear the pages out.
Oh, I had to destroy all my teen ones. I was terrified that one of my kids would read them. Suffice it to say I was not a Christian in my teens. . .
One thing that occurred to me as I was mulling over this question: Is there enough of my “new” journaling to show my growth in the Lord?
My journals before I was saved are very dark. I would not want people (including my children or grandchildren) to read them without having the complete story. My life in Christ makes me “new” and I want that part of the story to be what lives on.
I would love to be able to go through my old journals and write a commentary on them! I think that would leave a more complete picture. If I am not able to this, I’m not sure my “old stuff” outweighs my “new stuff”
I guess I should be finding more time to write then!
Just my 2 pennies…
Jenn
My vote is to keep them!! Of course you can go back and remove anything that you think may be questionable, but don’t underestimate the impact that they can have on future generations.
Last summer, my husband Juan received a couple of boxes that contained pieces of his family’s history. His mom died 4 years ago and in these boxes were memories of her high school and college years. What fun it was for us to sit back and read about her life written in her own hand. Sure there may have been things that were immature or embarrassing, but we gleaned a new understanding of her spiritual growth and development during those years.
In those boxes, there were also letters that Juan’s grandparents had sent each other during their courtship. We read them but htere are so many missing pieces that we wish we had the answers to. If only we had their journals 🙂
I have all my old journals (and there used to be a LOT) (not so much anymore) — boxed away in the attic. I’m not sure I’d want people to read them, but I think I have enough record of change that my immaturity and sinfulness is counteracted by I think some growth in Christ.
The thing is, if you get rid of them, you can never get them back! So I would wait a LONG while to do that. A LONG while. 🙂
Susan PA
I think I have now torn up or burned all my old journals, including poetry I wrote as a teenager (and it was really good stuff, too).
Everything I wrote was for my benefit and having nearly died twice now from complications of Juvenile Diabetes, I decided none of what I wrote would edify anyone else and there were items in there that others may not understand.
My only exception is a small journal I have kept off and on of my thoughts regarding various scripture verses. Those would be fine for my children or grandchildren.
I read recently about a mother who purchased a Bible with wide margins and wrote out her comments in the margins for the day she would not be around anymore. That is a wonderful idea.
I should say that we inherited all my mother-in-laws scrapbooks and the letters she received from various friends and family members. Those were fun to read and there was nothing in there that she would not have wanted to share.
When she was a young career woman, women often kept scrapbooks of everything of importance in their life.
We also have the cards she received when my husband was born…a very long time ago. 🙂
Easter blessings to you and your family, Sallie!
Two thoughts about journals:
1. When my dad died, my brothers and I read through some of his journals (he kept many through the years). It helped us to understand his struggles a little better. I kept the one that included the events surrounding my own wedding 27 years ago.
2. I just read in the Feb. 2007 AARP Bulletin about a lady who is giving her journals to her oldest granddaughter, on the proviso that they not be opened until that girl is the mother of adult children. She wrote, “My hope is that one of her children will be distanced enough to read them without being disappointed in me or feel that I was hypocritical in not revealing all aspects of myself.”
I heard a speaker at a writing conference say she felt cathartic burning her old journals, since they were written during her wild years in the 60s, before she became a Christian.
She said burning them made her feel free from her sinful past, and she began to teach on the Holy Spirit’s power to heal and restore — which ended up becoming a book with a Christian publisher!
I think old journals can provide so much fodder for writing — my old ones are embarrassing, but they help me see how much God has done in my life. My husband finds them hysterical! He’s learned a lot about me from reading my joys and heartaches, all dutifully recorded in little notebooks. 🙂
Such an interesting decision to ponder. So many bloggers are also (or have also been) journalists (or should I write journallers?).
From age 15-28, I was an avid journalist. Some of my journals were written in diary style, but mostly I journalled my Bible studies and prayers. The 12-15 decorative notebooks are full of sin, struggles, revelations and truth. Some I’ll gladly share with others, some I’m ashamed to let be seen. I’ve already been able to use pieces of my journals in ministry to other women who are struggling with similar life paths, so I’m confident that God will use them in the future. Journalling is a gift, and I hope God will use this gift (even though it forces me to humbly admit my sins!) to bless others in some small way.
I feel privileged to hear what other bloggers/journalists have to say about this topic!
I burned all of my old BC journals a couple of years back. They were full of misguided thinking, anguish and really stupid stuff.
I feel like my blog is my legacy to my children – and I plan to have the content put into book form. Any other journals shelf life will be continued on case by case. It’s fun to look back at some of the prayer journaling I’ve done to see what God’s done – not just in the actual situations, but how I’ve changed.
Not only will your daughter and her offspring be gratified to read them someday, access to this sort of source a century or so down the road is vital if historians are to be able to understand the “real” America. Correspondence used to be a major source for historians who wrote the history of everday lives–until people started telephoning, and stopped writing letters. (Email is even more of a challenge as most of it is not preserved). Blogging has been wonderful, but how will historians capture the content of blogging a hundred years down the road? B/c of the electronic revolution, paper sources of all kinds are becoming more and more valuable to us. As far as eventually archiving these things go, you could leave your journals to your daughter with the stipulation that they be donated to a state archives with a seal on them for a certain number of years (15-30 is customary).
I vote to hold onto them.
From my own experience, I can offer two possible reasons to hold onto old journals:
1. I’ve been working through a bout of major depression, which I’ve dealt with off and on for several years. When I feel “bad” I forget the mindset of when I feel “good” and vice-versa, so keeping a journal helps me remember the heights and the depths. I also go back, read my venting and my crying out to God, and see the path to renewal He has laid out for me.
2. My first thought on teenage journals was “Pitch them!” But then I think of the discussions my 8-year-old and I have had (and *will* have) about the changes she will go through, “birds and bees” issues, etc. I didn’t think I would *EVER* forget what it was like to be an adolescent and teenager, but, alas, I do forget. Perhaps I’ll dig those old diaries out someday when I start asking myself, “Why is my daughter like this?” Then I’ll realize that I’ve seen this girl before!
I tend to write more when I am sad. Thus, my jourals reflect mainly those sad times in my life. For that reason, anyone finding my journals would be left wondering if anything good ever happened in my life.
If it accurately portrayed my life, I would keep them. Since it makes me appear to be a very sad and lonely person, I probably will be burning them soon. Or, at least those sadly depressing repetative entries.
I’ve already gotten rid of my Bible study notebooks. As I read them, it almost looked as if I wanted someone to find them and remark about what a delightfully insightful person I was. Even I was embarrassed.
I’m glad that you posted this, Sallie. I’ve been enjoying everyone’s comments on this topic. I have many old journals — quite a large stack in fact. The only one I brought with me when I got married was the one I started when I met my husband. I gave it to him to read. The others I haven’t decided what to do with. In a sense, I wouldn’t mind keeping them for my daughter although there is a lot of immaturity I am sure!
On the other hand, I would prefer her to read the things I write now.
All the comments on this subject have been very helpful.
And here I thought this might end up being one of those posts where the comments were just crickets chirping! 🙂
So many interesting insights. David thought the variety of answers and perspectives was really great.
I’ve especially been thinking about the comment SB left about historians. (Great intials, BTW!) When I was younger (11-18) I was a prolific letter writer. I had many penpals and wrote very frequently. I have saved many of those letters. I still do write a lot, but as SB pointed out, the electronic letter writing phenomena has changed things so much from an historical perspective. I make a point of either saving a copy electronically or on paper of emails that mean a lot to me, but by no means all of them.
When I was in college I had the opportunity to use the historical archives at Michigan State to do research on teachers’ lives during some part of the 1800’s. (I can’t remember the particulars now but I think I saved that paper.) It was really fascinating to go through the diaries of teachers from so long ago and learn about their lives.
I’ve also thought about Judy’s comment about journaling more when sad. I know that was very true of me when I was in my 20’s. I definitely wrote scads of pages when I was troubled about something. It was my way of sorting through my feelings. But I’m not sure they would be all that helpful for Caroline to read someday.
So many other good comments! Thank you for leaving them and I look forward to seeing what other people have to say! 🙂
I’ve been reading for a while ~ I enjoy your blog. For what it is worth, I went through my old journals a couple of years ago. These were mostly from my pre-teen and early teen years. As Judy mentioned, I wrote generally when sad, and in reviewing the entries, I realized there was nothing in my attitude or behavior that I would want saved for posterity. I really didn’t enjoy reading through them myself, and wouldn’t want anyone else to read them. I wasn’t doing anything atrocious, my attitudes especially just weren’t anything I’d want my daughter (and now son, too) to emulate. So I tossed them ~ it was very freeing. It also helped declutter, something else I’m always working on!
I would keep them! Or at least think about it for a good.long.time before you ditched them! I have questioned the same thing myself many times and it is too true what somebody said about never being able to get them back. That is what’s stopped me. It’s always fascinating to read journal entries of others in times past. I also know that (like you, a prolific letter writer), I threw away many letters that part of me wishes I’d kept. I threw them because they were from people I thought were GOOD friends that “gave me the flick” and it seemed to help at the time. Some years down the track, I kind of regretted it. And even further years down the track, much healing has taken place in those situations. So, yeah, think a lot first. 🙂