From time to time I think about my experience in higher education and wonder. If I could do it over again, would I do it differently? I graduated from a smaller high school (150 in my class) and I was very ready to go to a larger university where everyone did not know everyone and their business.
Sometimes though I wish I had gone to a smaller liberal arts college. I wish I had more of that feeling of “belonging” that I think goes along with being at a smaller school. You know. Where the alumni magazine tells who married who and who had a baby and so on. Where you go back for homecoming and actually see people you know and spent four years with. That kind of stuff.
So would you do anything differently about your higher education experience? If you went, do you wish you hadn’t? If you didn’t go, do you wish you had? Wish you had picked a different school Different major? Different activities to be involved in? Spent more time studying? Less time studying?
I always have mixed feelings about this question because when I think about “If I had done this instead…” then I realize I would never have met this person or had that experience. But I still wonder how my life might have been different if I had done X instead of Y. Know what I mean?
Debby
Hi Sallie~
Well, I am very thankful for how the Lord orchestrated my college education. In high school I auditioned and was given a full tuition scholarship to Northern Arizona University (I play the viola). So, I packed up my stuff and headed up north. Now, I must say that I am and will always be a home-body. So, home-sickness was somthing I always struggled with but I knew that moving away from home would be really good for my growth personally and spiritually. When I started my first (and only) semester there I couldn’t believe the amount of practicing that was ahead of me! My major was music education, I played in all the main orchestras, chamber, quartet and not to mention my own individual lessons. I was no stranger to practicing but this took it to a whole new level. I would average about 8-12 hours a day in a practice room and/or symphony hall. That wasn’t even including the other regular classes I had to take & study for as well (English, College Algebra, etc…). Boy oh boy, I just get tired thinking of it! Through the whole time my relationship with my Lord grew immensly! I wouldn’t trade that experience for the world! Because I had no time to make freindships I relied totally on growing closer to my savior who sustained and comforted me each day I was there. I should point out that all I have ever really wanted is to be a stay at home wife and mother. Oh I would pray for a husband each and every day I was there. So the more I thought about things, it became clearer to me that this just wasn’t what I wanted to do. All the practicing sucked the enjoyement out of playing this instrument the Lord had blessed me with, and I had to pay $5000 a year in room and board (which meant I would end up with $25,000 in debt at the end of my schooling), and I had no time for friends. Needless to say I thought long and hard about whether I should go back to school at winter break. After making a list of 25 reasons why I didn’t think it was wise for me to return to NAU my parents understood and supported me 100%. I un-enrolled from school, got a job I enjoyed, was able to travel, and the Lord blessed me with a husband who I now get to put through school. I am so thankful for God’s providence in my life. He is soooo good!
Pam
I don’t have a good answer for you relative to MYSELF, but I often ponder how things might have worked out differently for my children if they had gone to different colleges, or if we had movd to another neighborhood when they were teenagers, or …………….. The what ifs are endless.
Jen C
I think I got the best of both worlds. I went to a large public university, yet lived at a small, Christian college residence on campus. I really did get the best of everything – the community that is often found at smaller colleges, a Christian environment where issues of faith are discussed openly, and the prestige and resources of a well-known large university.
I was pretty studious (I had to be to keep my scholarship that paid most of my tuition for 4 years), but at the same time, I took the time to develop deep friendships. I don’t regret a thing, as keeping that scholarship was the difference between graduating wit no debt and graduating with a lot of debt.
I don’t regret anything about my choice for university and the career choices I have made since. When I think about the “what ifs”, I realize that I did make the best choices, as those “ifs” are usually less-ideal than my current situation. Of course, I have to keep reminding myself of that every once in a while… 😉
Jen C
I think I got the best of both worlds. I went to a large public university, yet lived at a small, Christian college residence on campus. I really did get the best of everything – the community that is often found at smaller colleges, a Christian environment where issues of faith are discussed openly, and the prestige and resources of a well-known large university.
I was pretty studious (I had to be to keep my scholarship that paid most of my tuition for 4 years), but at the same time, I took the time to develop deep friendships. I don’t regret a thing, as keeping that scholarship was the difference between graduating wit no debt and graduating with a lot of debt.
I don’t regret anything about my choice for university and the career choices I have made since. When I think about the “what ifs”, I realize that I did make the best choices, as those “ifs” are usually less-ideal than my current situation. Of course, I have to keep reminding myself of that every once in a while… 😉
Jen C
Apologies for the double post… please delete one, Sallie. 🙂
Lizzie
Interesting question. I went to a small Christian college and our alumni news tells who married and who has babies;). The friends I made there are some of the very best friends in my life and we keep up with one another on facebook. It’s such a blessing to still be a small part of their lives. I even have several professors from there as friends on Facebook.
Anyway, the only thing I would have done differently is to get my Masters right away rather than “someday”. “Someday” still hasn’t arrived.
Mod Girl
I loved my “big school” college experience. Like you, Sallie, after finishing high school in a class of 92 I was ready, ready, ready to be a small fish in a big pond.
What would I do differently? I majored in English and History, and LOVED it, but was not well equipped at all for the professional world when I graduated. While God provided some great job opportunities for me before I was married and before I had children, I’ve always wished that I studied something that gave me a “skill”.
I am extremely blessed to be at home full-time with our children (and truly that is my heart’s desire) but if circumstances were to change and I needed to re-enter the professional world, well, I would feel pretty inexperienced and ill-equipped.
Jen
I never had a “normal” college experience. I wish I had. My parents made it very difficult for me to leave the nest and I had to fight them tooth and nail to get out. (That didn’t happen until I was 23.) At any rate, I went to college locally and lived at home, because they threatened not to help me with anything financially if I left. Being young and naive, my options were limited and I opted to suck it up and stay home. Needless to say, my relationship with my parents is forever damaged.
But, I’ve always been envious of my peers who lived on campus. My husband seems to have endless stories about his college years and roommates. I feel jealous when I hear them because that’s one time in my life I can never do over and experience.
Elaine
I think I’m in the minority here because I didn’t go to college. I worked as a secretary until I was pregnant with my first child and have been home ever since (22+ years). I’m glad I didn’t go b/c I always wanted to be a stay-at-home mom. Most of the ladies in our church are SAHMs and 99% went to college, graduated, got married and then stayed home. They never even entered the workforce! Everyone is different but that seems like a big waste of money to me!
I’m not against going to college but it seems so many ladies I know went but never did anything with the degree. I’m glad they are SAHMs but I just wonder what was the purpose of going to school in the first place. ❓
Ellen
Hmmm, I went to the small Christian liberal arts college a couple of hours from home. There are several ways in which I regret that decision. I think I would’ve found more people with my interests if I’d gone to a larger place and just gotten integrated into Christian groups there. Since the place was so small, a really bad situation with my roommate freshman year dogged me the rest of my college career.
Seriously, it was bad. She wasn’t coping well with being at college and not knowing what she wanted to do, and she made me look like an overbearing monster to the other girls in the dorm. Shaking in my presence, etc. She wouldn’t talk to me about it at the time; I never knew what hit me. She moved out of our room midyear. She left school, and later apologized, but the damage was done.
It was also hard because a lot of the people at the school came from small towns in the eastern part of the state, and I didn’t. I didn’t have the particular mindset or experience that they did.
I got a good education at that school. The professors in my major were good teachers and provided challenging assignments. The worst part about it was the lack of opportunities to make lifelong friends. The best thing I got out of it was my amazing husband, so I’d do it all over again just for him, but I don’t think I’ll encourage my kids to go to a small Christian school as the big thing I thought it was.
Lorry
My graduating class was around 65 students. I thought I would be lost going to the big university right out of high school so I chose a small two year college to start off with. The total enrollment was around 400. The professors had the students into their homes for meals and fellowship with their families. The church on campus had an adopt-a-student program. This was also where I met my husband. To this day this college holds a special place in my heart.
We (my future husband and I) both transferred to “the big university” after graduating with our associates degrees. I went with the expectation of not enjoying it, but just completing my education so I could teach. I don’t feel like I was swallowed up there because all of my core classes were completed at the smaller college, and pretty much all of my classes were in the college of education which was mostly housed in one building. I completed my undergraduate program and taught for a year before getting married. I went on to get my masters and specialist degrees. Either my husband or myself attended graduate classes for about the first seven years we were married. I don’t want to be ungrateful or complain against Providence, but I wouldn’t do it again.
My husband first proposed after our second year of college. I wish we had married then and I hadn’t continued my education. Things would be different, but I felt like I had to unlearn so much that I was taught at the university in order to be a godly wife and homeschooling mother.
My education was a source of pride for my parents; one of whom has a high school diploma and the other an associate degree. As an only child, I felt the need to please them. It’s ironic because I can still feel the disappointment from my parents that I didn’t get my doctorate (although my husband did). There are so many people especially in our church who may not have the degrees we do but are so much wiser. And I’ve come to value wisdom more than “an education.”
Ann
I’m so thankful I went where I went, a large state school. Something there for everyone. I think small colleges sound nice, but I liked the feeling of anonymity when I wanted it.
Brandy
For the most part, I’m satisified with my college experience. I think the faults in my education can be blamed on myself rather than the college I attended (with, naturally, a few exceptions). I will forever treasure that my husband and I attended the same college at the same time and share almost entirely the same memories of that period of our lives. That is a tie which binds us, I think.
As far as what was lacking in my education, it was due to a lack of bravery. Because I was a coward, I didn’t dare to take the harder classes or, more imporantly, the more challenging major. I now spend my spare time making up for the gaps. On the other had, it is a joy to learn in leisure and I think I get more out of it. 🙂
April
I went to a relatively large Christian college, and I had a great experience. But I do wish I had majored in what I really wanted to instead of what was practical. I really wanted to be a religion major. I wanted to learn Greek and Hebrew. But I had no idea what I would do with my education if I didn’t get married. So I majored in elementary education, student taught, and realized that I am not cut out to be a classroom teacher! I got married right before graduation and never taught in a classroom. I do teach my children at home, but since my classes were mainly about whatever educational fads were popular at the time, I don’t think they have helped me much.
TheNormalMiddle
I would have gone to med school. Seriously.
Florence
I would not change anything about my own college education. But my daughter went deeply into debt to go to law school and I certainly wish she had not.