There were a few reasons David and I never fully walked into the patriarchal camp when we went through a period of intense pressure from multiple outside sources regarding these topics. One of those reasons was the fact that it was obvious to both of us that I did not need a man to walk faithfully with God. I was 29 when we met and married. I had a rich faith history of my own. I had already experienced God working mightily in my spiritual life numerous times. Although my parents had a role in my faith, they were not the arbiters of it. And although they supported me in my faith journey, my journey was my own.
A Woman Does Not Need a Spiritual Covering
Because of my personal walk with God, it made no sense to either of us that suddenly my faith had to go through my husband. I did not need a covering or umbrella of protection. I did not need a man to wash me with the water of the word (as the men at David’s dysfunctional church told him he needed to do as well as get me in line to submit while we were engaged).
One of the things David loved about me when he met me was my vibrant faith and my history with God. He believed strongly it was insulting to think that just because he was a man he could somehow do better than God had done with me all those years.
Sarah in Hebrews 11:11-12
Wade Burleson preached a tremendous sermon on Hebrews 11:12-12 on e-church at Wartburg. He looks at Sarah’s faith and what it accomplished in her life. I encourage you to listen to the entire sermon, especially if you believe your faith in God is dependent on anyone other than you whether it be a father, a husband, or a church leader.
This sermon brings out some of the concerns I have about men being seen as the prophet, priest, and king of his home. I think it is tragic when young women think that they are dependent on their father for their faith and then their husband if they marry.
Sallie – I saw your comment on TWW and had to check out your blog. I did not realize you also homeschool and it looks like you are way ahead of me on the egal/comp issue. I am just now dealing with Patriarchy in a personal way. I thought it was about Duggars, Doug Phillips, Doug Wilson-type folks, etc, but I am seeing that it indeed is in my own home and we are in the process of wrestling with this issue. It is so destructive. This is what I’m reading all over and I am deeply concerned about the amount of homeschooling families who buy into these patriarchal philosophies and bring them to their own churches. My adult daughter (age 25) and her peers are thinking back on their childhoods, the environments in which they were raised (highly controlled), and we are just beginning to hear these young adults speak out and a lot of it is NOT pretty.
Wade’s sermon was absolutely incredible. Can you imagine if that sermon was shown at a homeschool convention? Whoa! The heads would be rolling.
I am looking for good material on this topic to read. If you have any recommendations, please send them my way (or anyone else who reads this) bgbcsurvivors@gmail.com
Julie Ann,
Somehow I missed responding to this comment! I apologize!
Have you been to Karen Campbell’s blog (www.thatmom.com)? She has a lot of resources, posts and podcasts about this topic. I would start there with some of her podcasts.
Wow. Karen Campbells thatmom.com blog got me started on a whole lot of issues, the Pearl’s literature and teachings (yuck), Doug Phillips controversies, and gave me a whole different perspective on homeschooling and changing my approach. Maybe it was from her that I found your blog. Wish she still had her blog. I am so glad that a wide range of issues are being tackled on your blog as well.
Thank you!
Hi Kris,
Karen was one of the first online friends I made way back in 2005 when I started blogging. She intends to have her blog up, but something is wrong with it and her husband hasn’t been able/had time to fix it. But she has such a wealth of information that I hope she gets it back up soon.
It’s not an exaggeration to say that Karen was one of the bloggers who changed the trajectory of my mothering and homeschooling. I will always be grateful for her and that God connected us online.
Karen is included in my list here.
https://sallieborrink.com/11-lists-of-11-things-from-11-years-of-motherhood
Sallie