Here’s a topic that’s been on my mind for a long time. I’ll throw this out here and see where the conversation goes. I want to state that this conversation should be in the context of Christianity because that is a large part of what I’m trying to reconcile in my mind.
We’re all familiar with the phrase “what goes around comes around.” It seems to me that there are some people who take special delight in seeing people’s children give them grief. Kind of the “you were like that as a child and now you are getting your payback.”
This has bothered me because it seems like there is something inherently wrong in wishing ill on someone else. I don’t know how else to describe this attitude. I’ve been around people who think it is extremely funny or rewarding or satisfying or something to see other people struggle with making their children behave, watching their children get into scrapes, etc. Now I understand that children are sinful creatures and are going to be naughty. I’m not expecting sinlessness out of any child. But to see people find it very satisfying to see others struggle with their children just bothers me.
I guess what bothers me (as best as I can articulate it right now) is that it seems completely the opposite of what I think would be a biblical attitude. Doesn’t it seem like each generation should be praying for and working towards families that are increasingly godly and raising up a generation of children who take walking with Christ to the next level?
I find it hard to believe that somehow I will rejoice and laugh if Caroline has a daughter who doesn’t sleep through the night for several months and consider this as “payback” for all the nights she kept us up. I would hope for her a baby that would sleep through the night starting with the first night home from the hospital! It is hard for me to imagine rejoicing in the fact that her children are giving her trouble so I can somehow feel better about myself or somehow feel vindicated.
That’s the best I can do in articulating what I’m thinking about. Maybe as the conversation gets flowing I can add more. Has anyone else experienced this? Does it bother you? What are your thoughts?
Anita
So, since plugs are being made for BSF, let me also give another option. My husband and I joined a Community Bible Study group. Here is their web site. http://www.communitybiblestudy.org/ It’s very similar to BSF with the exception (if what I’ve heard is correct) that BSF is always separated into men’s groups and women’s groups. Our CBS class has a couples group where husbands and wives can study the Bible together. I’d encourage anyone wanting to study the Bible with their spouse to check out CBS as well. My husband and I love it!
Kendra
Somehow my name gained an extra R back there!
Kendra
And my original comment disappeared!
What I wrote was that I also don’t understand those who say, “Well, nobody helped me.” Shouldn’t we as believers be trying to be like Christ, who would have looked at a struggling new mother and said, “What can I do to help you?”
Kendra
You are absolutely right. I also don’t understand the attitude I received early on in my parenting- “Well, nobody ever helped me.” Wow. As you say, the Christ-like attitude is one that says, “I didn’t have help and I don’t want anyone to feel as I did. How can I help you?”