Ah, yes. I knew they had to come. All those well-intentioned questions about preschool. They have begun.
I mean, Caroline is almost two and a half. It’s panic time, people! She’s getting behind even though she speaks in ten word sentences! She knows her letters, colors, numbers, shapes, can identify various birds by name, and already knows more science than most kindergartners. (David’s dad asked if we sit around teaching her all day because she knows so much. Believe me, we don’t!) She helps with all kinds of things around the house and LOVES IT – putting laundry down the chute, wiping floors, cleaning the bathroom, dusting the wood floors, using the FlyLady dusters to dust, putting laundry away, setting the table, emptying the dishwasher, mowing the lawn (don’t freak – we have a reel mower), sorting the recycling, washing the car… She LOVES to help around the house and we talk all the time while we do it. That’s why she could wake up in the morning about a month ago, hear the printer in the office and proclaim loudly, “I need to get out and get that paper from the printer!” (Another one of her very favorite jobs.) She loves adults, gets excited about babies, is comfortable around other children her own size, and is fascinated by older girls. The only thing that puts her off a bit is older boys and that is just fine with me! (The one major negative? She is majorly scared of the vacuum cleaner.)
We recently had someone give us a polite sort-of-hard-sell about a preschool in our area. I listened politely and asked a few questions. I knew the person meant well, but I just didn’t feel up to actually debating the whole topic of preschool and I knew the person was just trying to be helpful.
So, yes, we are starting to get the preschool question. And, honestly, the only time I think about sending Caroline to preschool is when I’m either very tired or have a lot of work to do. But at this point I’m quite sure preschool would not be the best thing for her. And we continue to operate from our default mode of thinking which is that we will homeschool unless God shows us differently.
I was interested to see that Barbara Curtis at MommyLife is doing a series about doing preschool at home. She has 12 (!) children and was a Montessori teacher. She has three parts to the series so far (which are now only in the Wayback Machine).
Why homeschool preschool? Part 1
Why homeschool preschool? Part 2
Why homeschool preschool? Part 3
Barbara also put up a related post called Is homeschool for everyone? She made this excellent point:
Last week I mentioned a mother who sought my advice because her second grader was beginning to struggle at school. When I met with the homeschooling moms on Tuesday, there was another mom who came with tears in her eyes because her second grade son (Catholic School) was floundering. The teachers suggested ADHD and she had already taken him to a clinical psychologist. He was obviously headed on the path to medication.
Mothers!!!! Please, know that when your child does not conform to school model that doesn’t necessarily mean that there is something wrong with your child. It just means that the way we educate kids in this country is very cookie-cutter. Children are expected to behave and conform in a certain way. Any deviance from the expectation becomes an inconvenience and the reaction is to fix the problem with summer school, specialists and/or drugs. The option that is never recommended is to remove the child from school and to educate him or her at home to remove the pressure and give them a better chance to succeed.
I have lots of strong opinions about education but I don’t usually air them here. But the idea of expecting children to conform in a classroom setting is a real hot button for me. My time spent teaching gave me the background to think about these topics and my views have really changed since I left the classroom. I’m sure I’ll write more about these topics in the days ahead. In the meantime, enjoy Barbara’s articles. 🙂
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Two year old preschool has always been a bit of a mind-bender for me but I think that some people are very eager for their children to start what they would consider “real life” – meaning school. To my way of thinking school is actually “fake life” but then, I am out of the norm in most ways. But what I wanted to comment upon was Caroline saying that she wanted to “get out and get the paper from the printer”. I am guessing she is still in a crib and it just struck me as sooo funny that a little one in a crib was speaking like an administartive assistant. Too cute.
We too decided not to put our preschooler in preschool because he loves being at home, I love having him with me, and, frankly, adding preschool to the mix of weekly life would put us on a path to a much less simpler life (hello, getting up and out the door, car pool lines, class parties, teacher appreciation, etc). I’ve had to answer the “why” question from a handful of folks, and I’ve found that I can’t make others understand our decision if they are convinced preschool is the next step. Oh well. Ultimately we answer to God and make decisions as He leads up, right?!
Thanks for sharing the links and some of your thoughts. As you know, classroom expectations, homeschooling, and the unique learning needs of different children are top of mind for us right now.
We get it too, though I thought it would be really good for my girl for a year. I thought she would like the other kids, the crafts, sort of like a weekly playdate. Now she is about to read (at 3.5) so I don’t understand what Preschool would be working towards. We wouldn’t start until the fall, but by then she could be ready for Kindergarten! So, now I don’t know. I am not hot to send my kids off for education since we can do it much more thoroughly at home. Plus, there are SO MANY other classes kids can take to round out their lives, like an art class, or a dance class. Those can fill some of her peer-sharing needs and making new friends. One or two classes like that can aid her education in areas I am not as skilled in. The academics I can do at home. I see public education getting fainter and fainter in our future. But times might change.
I don’t know what pre school is like in the States. My son goes and loves it. It is all play based, and learning is done through craft/activity/discussion etc. They are currently learning some phonic sounds with the ones who will begin school in September and are working on number recognition etc.
But although I did send him, he did not start until he was almost 3. I got asked that question alot as pre schools can take children from 2yrs here. I actually had quite a neat answer though- he did not walk until after he was 2 🙂 I also got the ‘when are you going back to work’ question linked with the pre school question on the assumption that I would use it as child care……..
Anyway, I should know better than to comment on these questions because the set up is different here…..but I think British Christians are soon going to have to face the fact that school here has changed too much for them to be happy having their children in ‘teh system’.
I would really like to hear your thoughts about the conformity thing.
Oh man, the preschool question. For a two-year-old. People have really lost perspective. I think that this is a result of our daycare culture. I don’t mean this as a judgment on working moms, I know people have to work and use daycare and it all works out fine. But as a SAHM, what this means, is that some of us now run around worrying that our toddlers are getting enough “socialization.”
I put my first kid, when he was two, in a preschool and we only lasted two weeks. It was awful, he would cry at dropoff and I was just like, What am I doing? So I pulled him out (right before the tuition payment was due, I’m sure that was a motivating factor!). Then we went back when he was 4.5 years old and it was a piece of cake and he enjoyed it. I do think a little bit of preschool is useful if you are doing regular school, just to get a feeling about how a classroom works. Although I also think that 99% of kids would be just fine without it as long as their home life was full and rich.
With my second kid, I am not doing anything structured until she is 5 (she’ll be almost 6 when she goes to K because of the cutoffs). She can be with us, hang out with the neighbors, go to the park, read with us, and spend time with her brother and that is wonderful.
I remember those days. Ahhh…the questions the questions.
I understand. And I, too, would love to hear your thoughts on conformity. I have opinions, too, but I didn’t become a teacher until I began teaching my own children, so my opinions concerning conformity are based on my experience as a student. I would love to read your opinions from a teacher’s perspective.
About being afraid of the vacuum: I think you posted about Caroline’s sensitivity to noise back when she was a baby. Everything you said then sounded like my older daughter, and now this does, too. Now that my daughter is able to express her feelings better (she is now four), she says that it “scares my ears.” I think this goes back to the hypersensitive hearing/late term ultrasound issue from a year or two ago. After allowing her to hide from the vaccum all these years, I have begun trying to teach her to vaccum so that she understands that the vaccum isn’t actually going to hurt her, but I really do think the fear comes from her hearing being different from a normal person. Perhaps this is the issue with Caroline. But of course I’m just guessing… 😉
Ah, the preschool dilemma. Funny story – when my mil’s oldest grandson was enrolled in preschool – my mil questioned the need for preschool; then the following year her second oldest grandson was enrolled in preschool – and by then she thought preschool was a great thing; then it was our turn, and we planned to homeschool, so no preschool for us (grandson #3) – oh, we had her so confused 🙂 and we still do!