Dwayne explained this very well in I Don’t Care WHAT The Truth Is… I have been in that place for a long time. I’ve said very similar things to the Lord. 

When you get to this point, it is very freeing. Not because it allows you to believe anything, but because you no longer care if others approve. The only thing that matters is understanding who God has revealed Himself to be and what He desires via the truth in His word.

Do I always get it perfectly right? I sincerely doubt it. I’m sure Dwayne and I would disagree on some things. But God knows my heart and my desire to please Him, even if I do it imperfectly. My only perfection comes from the blood of Christ. But I don’t really care what men say. I only care what the truth is.