I’ve been rather quiet around here in recent weeks. It’s really kind of a multi-part explanation, but the foundation is this. 

I’m tired. 

Not physically tired. In fact, I’ve been doing a lot of great things around my home the past few weeks and I’m pleased with the results. 

I’m tired of information.

That’s really it in a nutshell.

Tired of religious stuff. Tired of political stuff. Tired of lies. Tired of the wolves. 

I’m tired of information. I’m tired of vetting information. I’m tired of vetting the people who are offering the information. I’m tired of deciding what to do with information I’ve vetted. This includes doctrine, current events, etc. It’s not just a news thing. It’s an all-of-life thing. 

I did my stint in the online fifth generation information war for the past several years. I gave a tremendous amount of energy to it and I’m tired.

When I wrote this in Choosing a Simpler and More Analog Life last month, I meant it.

I hit a wall with it all and said to David that I understand why “older women” simply check out of the real world as much as possible. I see this discussed frequently in blog comment sections and feel conflicted about it. On the one hand, I understand it. I understand the desire for simplicity and wanting to protect your mental health. On the other hand, quality people checking out is part of the reason why our country is the complete mess it is. 

I can observe older women believing lies and propaganda on a daily basis. I can see it in blog comments. I say nothing. I can see it in blog posts. I say nothing. But I’m sad for them. I’m sad that they are living with stress and such that isn’t necessary.

But I’m tired of dealing with information and discussing information. 

I’m also tired of complications. 

David and I set up the Thinking About Theology website a few weeks ago. I like it. But I’m not sure I want to continue it. As I said in Creating Content That Includes Other People, it takes a lot of effort to include things beyond your own. I wrote this in a comment on that post.

Every link, every video, every featured image, etc. has to be managed. Every plugin and paid service. Multiply that across hundreds or thousands of posts and it’s a huge task.

Not only that but every time you add someone else to your content you run the risk of needing to remove that content. It’s mind-boggling how many people (including Christians and “Christians”) have gone off the rails, are in the process of going off the rails, or will probably go off the rails. It’s easier to simply never mention other people. Really.

Additionally, last week I hit the featured image reality I mentioned up above. David and I purchased a new theme for my website. You might have seen it if you stopped by. (It was pink and very feminine.). I liked it and it was very well made. But we realized that we would have to redo Every. Single. Featured. Image. on my website due to the size requirements. We looked for work arounds. There wasn’t one. We would have had to redo 1600 featured images. Yes, one thousand six hundred featured images. One for each published post here.

I tallied the numbers. If I worked on it two hours a day, five days a week, it would take me somewhere between 4-7 weeks to get them all switched out. I might have finished by Independence Day. That’s ONLY dealing with images. Not writing anything new. Nothing else. And assuming life hummed along and nothing stopped me from my two hours a day, five days a week. (What are the odds that would be reality? Slim to none?) David would also have to invest a huge amount of time, taking him away from paying clients to the tune of literally thousands of dollars. There was no way it was worth it. Even putting aside the financial cost, there was no way I wanted to devote that much of my life energy to a task like that. It would have consumed a significant portion of my spring and summer freetime. Just doing images. 

So we switched back to this theme and I made peace with the fact that I’m rapidly approaching that “older woman” mindset where I no longer want to be bothered. Maybe I’m already there? It is starting to feel like it. Whatever is the case, I’m not willing to work that hard on the design of this website just to make it more “palatable” to more women. 

I’m realizing I’m perfectly content to live in my Grandmacore life that I was living long before anyone came up with the terms Cottagecore or Grandmacore. I’m so naturally Grandmacore that I laugh when I read descriptions of it like it’s something new. No, it’s just life for me and many other women. And I think maybe it’s time to just embrace my Grandmacore life online as well. 

So I’ve purposefully not made any rash decisions over these recent weeks while I’ve been quiet. I didn’t delete any websites. I still haven’t deleted my Twitter/X account. I didn’t make any more changes to anything. I simply stepped back and waited to see how I would feel about things. I focused more on my home. I did more reading. I watched some movies. 

But I am still tired and don’t have the enthusiasm to do information – Christian or not- any longer. I’m not sad or angry or depressed. I’m just kind of ready to move on to another phase of my life. A phase where I can write content that doesn’t offend or upset people. Content that draws people in rather than challenges them so they leave in order to protect themselves.

I think I’m ready to move on to the benign stage of my blogging. An online dictionary defines benign as “gentle and kindly” and I like that. I’m ready to focus on gentle and kindly topics and let other people fight the battles that I no longer want to fight. 

So that’s the short of what I’m thinking about and have been doing recently. 

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