Emily Yoffe from Slate wrote Why Childless People Hate Me in response to a flurry of negative responses she received when she encouraged a young woman to reconsider her decision not to have children.
The quote that jumped out at me was the same one that Spunky pointed out in her post on this article (probably because it illustrates so well what I was trying to express in a previous post):
In our society parents do a wonderful job of portraying the difficulties of having children: the financial burdens, the time drain, the guilt, the exhaustion. But we do a lousy job of getting across something else about parenthood: It’s fun! When you are experiencing parenthood from the inside, there is an overwhelming pleasure in the funny, fascinating things your children do. When my daughter was 2, she put her arms around me as I was kissing her goodnight and said to me, “Mommy, you’re a wonderful husband.” That was better than any of the movies I hadn’t been to since she was born.
I have to admit that this is one of the things I’m really looking forward to. I remember how much I enjoyed hearing my first grade students say funny things. And one of my favorite parts of Country magazine is the section called “Little Humor” where readers write in and share the funny things their small children say. I read them aloud to David when we are in bed and we lay there and laugh and laugh. So I can only imagine how much I will enjoy discovering Peanut’s little personality and hearing her funnies.
I also agree with the author about people not having a realistic sense of the passing of time. When David and I talked about the possibility of never being blessed with children, one of the things that weighed heaviest on me was the thought of growing old and not having children to care for one or both of us, especially if one of us passes away significantly sooner than the other. Of course having a child is no guarantee that this will happen, but it certainly increases our chances of passing through our elderly years with the enjoyment of family. Yes, having our freedom to come and go now is great, but I’d like to think of myself as longer-thinking than just today and next week.
I really have appreciated the people around me – whether friends, family or online friends – who have waxed eloquent on the joys and blessings of having children. It is so great to hear them say that we have much to look forward to in the days and months ahead. I appreciate their attitude and the encouragement it has been to me. I’m enough of a realist to already have some natural apprehension regarding loss of sleep, taking care of sick kids, loss of personal freedom, and the like. What helps me most is to observe happy Christian parents who love the joys associated with having children because then I know that it is possible for me, too.








AMEN! We all need someone to help us put out teeth in when we’re 80!
That was a most excellent article. Thanks for linking.
You are welcome! 🙂